What is the main reason of you having low-self esteem?

I was bullied throughout my highschool years, and although I have come a LONG way since then, sometimes part of me still thinks "what I I really am ugly/fat/worthless..." etc It's difficult to explain.

Ok (cracks thumbs), here we go:

I have a long history of destroying people I care about because I can't completely trust them. People are not all THAT different, and I have been abused, beaten, shanked, molested, raped, humiliated, and lied to countless of times. So, try to make me happy and I will question you. If, I believe you, I will start to wonder when the flame does out, when you get bored and leave me. There's always something. I know I laid there last night unable to sleep because I was thinking too much. My thought train chugs on:

Why are you too quiet? Clearly I'm on the back burner.
So much for love..
Wait, don't be so selfish, I'll give you a week.
No, that's too long.
I swear, she's going to tell me eventually that she found someone.
Fuck! Why did I even bother?
No, this couldn't be a lie, could it?
Then again...

Ect...

You get the jist. So, in order to protect myself I push them away, "Let's stay friends" or, "I have to go."
But, it kills me.
Every. Single. Time.

So, why do I have no self-esteem? Because I'm a piece of shit for believing things could be normal. That I could love and be loved, no questions asked, in a world full of shitty people.

There you go.

pretty much bullied and told things to make me feel that I'll never reach a level of adoration

Because I don't seem to be very important to others. When things happen somehow they always forget to tell me about it but think to tell a lot of other people.

People telling me to not to expect to get much out of life since I am unattractive.

Mainly mental illness and how it affects me. But it's quite complicated.

The label "confused" that I wore too well.

[image deleted] im not attractive always hated my appearance. was bullied a lot in life because of my appearance and being turned down by girls i had liked over they didnt find me attractive.

Mine used to be the way I look.

Mine is very healthy! Not low at all..

Other than immediate family I've always been mostly alone with some exceptions, I was always left out as a kid and had social anxiety, I was never really well known, more like a ghost, that's part of it anyway.

It's personal.

It's not so much low self esteem ,it's the fact that I'm introverted and some confuse that with low self esteem ...I find if annoying

Thank you every one for sharing, i will be getting back soon. I am writing a paper atm. May God bless you all. 💗💗

I have normal self esteem. Being well aware of who I am and my capabilities,helps.

I don't have low self-esteem. I think I'm pretty damn cool and such.

Body issues

Look at me , just have a goood look !!!!

Girls won't talk ta me😭

I was raised to.

I don't

Why

I don't