Is it wrong to call women "Sweetheart" on the phone?

I work as a telephone agent. My last caller insisted on calling me "sweetheart" during the call. He was an older gentleman. I get this from time to time, especially from older men in the American South. When guys talk like that, I feel a mix of feelings as a woman, both valued but also patronized.

Do you think it's good or bad when men talk to women this way? Why do you think so?

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FrozenWasteland · 61-69, M

Like most things in life, context is important. I could see "sweetheart" used either as a kind of warm, appreciative sort of comment -- a "Thank you, sweetheart..." sort of thing, or as patronizing "Now listen up, sweetheart..."

Easy for me to say, since I really don't care what people call me, but I don't think it's the word that's the problem -- it's the message behind it. Which, admittedly, can be a little hard to figure out over the phone. All I can suggest is that you accept it in the spirit in which it was intended. Or not, as it suits you.

I don't even know why I'm responding to this now. Clearly I don't have as much to say as I first thought. :-)

ShadowSister · 46-50, F

@FrozenWasteland Lol I love it. Thank you for responding. 😀

PhoenixPhail · M

@FrozenWasteland Very well put. 👍

DogMan · 61-69, M

@FrozenWasteland That is a great attitude. It is what we think that matters.
Some people allow themselves to be offended, that is a personal problem.
I'm old, I was taught "Sticks and Stones" now kids are taught that words are
violence. I am the captain of my thoughts, I do not let negative thoughts take
hold in my mind. I replace them with things I love.