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Are pushover people cowards? Be honest

My family calls me a pushover and way too nice and soft heard and I’m too stubborn to listen to their advice and refuse to do anything to get respect and I keep crying about it. My male cousin said it’s a pathetic that a young woman can’t even stand up for herself and let’s people push her around and talk to her that way. No wonder dad was frustrated and called me weak right in my face. He kept getting into my face to see if I would react but I didn’t and started crying and fell down. My dad said, “You’re pathetic. At least I have one daughter that isn’t a pushover and actually has respect for herself and a STRONG WOMAN.”
My ex best friend called me a coward because I’m too nice to stand up for myself.

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Abstraction · 61-69, M

I don't think 'coward' is constructive at all. It's difficult to respond without meeting you and knowing how you tick, but hopefully this is helpful.
Many people who aren't assertive are lovely people, considerate and non-confrontational by nature and have therefore simply not learnt the certain relationship skills to work through a confrontational situation or where people are pushing their own way.
Aggressive vs pushover are not the only ways to live. => What's helpful is that there is a third option. Assertiveness. Assertiveness is a set of skills that allows you to gently negotiate your way through a situation where you might be being manipulated, used, having your rights disrespected. It's NOT aggressive.
If you had a chance to do 'Assertiveness Training' take it. If not,
https://positivepsychology.com/assertiveness-training/
https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/Assertiveness.htm
That way you can continue to be a lovely, sensitive, considerate person but not walked over by others.

Abstraction · 61-69, M

@Abstraction I have a background in counselling, so I back my answer over anything your family or others might say. Everyone has fears. Different fears. Some are afraid of spiders, flying, speaking in public, admitting they are wrong, being found out, being known for who they are, apologising, being rejected... I've had to overcome many fears in my life. We can overcome our fears by learning new skills and ways of seeing things. That's what I pointed you towards. Even if you read up and learn one skill and try it... you'll gradually find it easier and easier.

SW-User

Coward isn't the most constructive way of calling someone who can be pushed around.
But there might be deeper issues that make you allow people to push you over.
Only you can did deep to figure out why you let this happen.
What are you scared of that will happen if you stood up for yourself, or said no to someone? (qns you need to start asking yourself).

IamBack · 31-35, M

You’re not a coward nor a pushover, the world needs more kind people!

It’s difficult to say “no” when you have a good heart, a skill that you will pick up as you progress in life

LaylaTheTallGirl · 22-25, F

@IamBack how do you know?

IamBack · 31-35, M

@LaylaTheTallGirl because I used to be nice and now I’m a grumpy ass manager lol

MrGomco · 36-40, M

Yes.

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