Do you keep your public image good and perfect?

@MarkPaul haha lies!

@popmol You more than many know how good, perfect, and pure my public image is. I demand a public apology and a small monthly stipend. I will accept nothing less.

@MarkPaul neigh i like some decent slander once in a while xD

@popmol Well, I expect a personal apology and a small one- time token of your sincerity. I will accept nothing less. Also, perhaps you will be kind enough to have your driver take me to the downtown area for some sight-seeing.

@MarkPaul what do you think i am i'm a random bloke not a rich guy

@popmol Well, I will wait for you to write a note of regret for bad-mouthing my good, perfect, and pure public image. I will accept nothing less.

And, while I am waiting... perhaps you can prepare a carefully presented 6-course dinner for me and my entourage... except for my driver. He doesn't like to eat food that hasn't been previously verified and validated. Perhaps you can order something out for him?

@MarkPaul thats too much work.

i only do 7 course dinners so since you didn't ask that i will not do it!

@popmol Well, this is quite unusual and awkward. I will need room and board for the time it will take for us to negotiate a proper settlement. Perhaps, you can whip up a pork chop on a stick. I find that I am rather hungry. And, might I trouble you for bottled water (not plastic) with a side order of ice cubes in a glass... oh, and please be sure each ice cube is of standard size? Which way to the guest house?

@MarkPaul this isn't a restaurant or a hotel!

@popmol Yes, but I'm a guest, so...

@MarkPaul i never invited you in!

@popmol Well... technically that's true, of course. But, since I invited myself in, there is a certain expected agreement of sorts... don't you see that? And, now that I am here... well... you can't very well expect me to live in a chair. By the way, can we move the chair closer to the window and make some minor rearrangement changes so my sensitivities are not offended. I can give you a list of the changes I require... to make it easier on everyone.

@MarkPaul a self invited guest can be seen as an intruder so i should call the police!

@popmol Yeah, but you insulted my good, perfect, and pure public image. Let's not forget that, now or ever. You attempted to contaminate my purity. And, you have failed to live up to the manners that you are expected to deliver. Kindly prepare a fresh (not canned) fruit cocktail while I wait for you to prepare a suitable apology.

@MarkPaul thats not at all!

@popmol What else is there? Clearly, you have some explaining to do. Could you prepare some fresh cheese sticks while you explain yourself. And, please don't neglect the presentation.

@MarkPaul well i'll be calling the police!

@popmol You wouldn't! Besides, they will never believe you. It will be your word against mine.

@MarkPaul its my house!

@popmol It's my reputation!

@MarkPaul well that won't yo ua free get out of jail for breaking and entering!

@popmol Do you know who I am????? You can't treat me like a common criminal. Now... I suggest you calm down, prepare some dinner, and let me relax. This whole thing has been exhausting.

@MarkPaul fine i'll treat you like an extraordinary criminal! i'll send the loopy police!

@popmol You won't get away with this. Please pack up my things and notify my driver. I won't stay a moment longer. I will be reporting you to the authorities.

@MarkPaul an intruder leaving and calling the police for the guy he intruded on? yeah that will work xD