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Hey, you.... I am a biiig boss in a biiig murder company. And we are hiring!

But in order to get hired, you have to confess to everyone you've murdered so I know you're good at murdering and so I trust you.
Also, I'm totes not a cop.
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I’m not a cop either. I just dress up as one for Halloween and costume parties. Yes, yes. Now I have a rock solid alibi!
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