I hate that I don't have happiness and positivity even tho I tell myself to. Why doesn't this work?

Thank you, all of you, for taking the time to respond to my post. I appreciate your thoughtful responses -- many of them comforted me and gave me things to think about. Thank you.

I think maybe some people are destined to live a life of unhappiness and there's nothing that can be done. People say, try this, do that, think this, like they know better than you, like you haven't tried all that before millions of times, like your stupid and then they think it's because you don't want to be happy at all.... Who the hell chooses to be miserable?

Perhaps you are holding on to ideas that do not bring happiness?
I am not judging you, so please do not think that, I don't know you.
I just know that is what helped me, letting go of what I could not have and trying to embrace what I can.

@76starships Maybe that's true to some degree, but I think a life-time of negative self-talk and distorted thinking has have highly contributed to my unhappiness. (Maybe a better word besides happiness would have been "peace"....)

Happiness comes from being contented. If there are things that keep you discounted, money troubles, a job you dislike, family who are verbally abusive, a partner who doesn't appreciate you, kids who are out of control happiness could be just around the corner, but this one thing keeps it from coming to you.

Don't look for the happiness. Try instead to figure out what's the biggest negative factor in your life that's making you discontented. And work on changing that.

Happiness has to happen spontaneously. Try to do more of the things you enjoy

You can talk back to negative thoughts, but that doesn't take you to "happy." Happy comes from the small things. Smiles from someone who loves you, simple pleasures, a surprise hello from a friend.

When I am feeling down, those little things matter.

Sounds like you're forcing it. That usually doesn't work too well.

Because happiness and positivity don’t exist. 😋