Hey, what if it never gets better?

I've had to grapple with this reality more than most. What happens are that there are these little pockets of goodness that make it worth it and give the suffering meaning. Falling in love. Living to see just one more sunset. Learning new ways to be human. It's always those things I think of when the doctors are asking me, "do you want us to bring you back?" And I say yes even though there is little hope of meaningful recovery. I want more of those moments.