They say that "water seeks its own depth."

But remember and never forget this: if you don't plumb your OWN DEPTHS to know how much is TRULY THERE..you will end up with the wrong person EVERY TIME.

And if you are loving enough to your potential mate to say, "Look I am going to Groucho Marx you and say that I would never be in the club that would have me as a member. You can do better than me, so I release you bc that is TRUE love"...

...but then you don't ALSO temper that with, "But I WOULD be a part of the club for people who are desperately trying to improve, and if you want to be with someone who is master of the endless glow-up, that's me"...

...you will also do a disservice to that potential mate every time too.

Just some thoughts..About to gym it up.

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SW-User

Kids will look at someone and get all starry eyed and romantic -- without first taking a ruthlessly honest look at themselves to see if they are well matched to the person they've chosen. As we age, experience teaches that you need to understand your own value (or lack of it) in the marketplace.

foldedunfolding · 41-45, F

@SW-User that is exactly it, and boy does it suck balls looking at myself lol..that disney fairytale is soo harmful

SW-User

@foldedunfolding I wasn't of the Disney generation, but I know what you mean about damage from stories with happily ever after endings. It isn't realistic, and most of us outside of Hollywood don't look like Cinderella. (and I don't just mean physical appearance when I say that).