Anxious
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I’m Worried about My Future (sorry for my bad English and writing)

Hi, I’m a Japanese woman and I just turned 20 few days ago. Im not sure but maybe because of it I suddenly started to worry about my future so much that I can’t sleep well or even I sometimes suddenly cry…

Im going to start job hunting from this year, so I started to analyze myself, what I worked hard for in these uni student period, what I want to do after graduation or stuff like this. But the more I analyze myself, the more I realize that I did literally nothing in my uni period and I’m completely unsure what I want to do or where I want to work at. To be honest, I don’t wanna work that hard and I’m so sick of the way how we, Japanese work at the office. We don’t have any free time if we work at the office, and most of office workers lifestyles are completely inconvenient and not fun at all.

My future dream, after I get old, is to live in the countryside in foreign country where is surrounded by nature, and to do my hobbies all day and live so freely and comfortably. I’ve had a big desire for a free lifestyle for a long time, and I used to have a strong yearning for the free life of a pirate and the freedom of working on a ranch when I was a kid.This could be the reason of my future dream…

I know I have to work hard, sacrificing many things and endure the inconvenient life in order to achieve my future dream… but when I think of myself living that unfree and uncomfortable life after graduation, I can’t help but cry and despair. You would think that if I don’t wanna work at the office that much I should work as a farmer or a fisherman or like that, but the thing is, I go to a quite good and expensive university in japan now thanks to my father, and I don’t want to make my family and relatives get disappointed in me because they seem to have high expectations towards me. I’m not saying a farmer or fisherman are not good job that are considered as “disappointing job”, but I just don’t have any knowledges to do those jobs and if I get the job like that, what I’m learning in uni right now will end up being worthless and waste of money and time. (I’m learning commerce and business in university) I’m not even sure what I’m writing right now… but I want opinions from you guys, not from Japanese people. What job seems good for me? How can I disappear those worries?

I’m considering working abroad, but I know nothing about the work style of foreign countries and I don’t have enough language skills… I know I use excuses so much to avoid working hard and im so ignorant about the society. But please be kind to me… and I’m sorry for my poor English and long sentences.
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eyeno · M
My advice to my son many years ago, before entering college was to take classes that he'll use in the work place.
Something that he enjoys, good at and practical that will reinforce his career in the work place.
Money will come in time with experience.

Arukas3 · 18-21, F
@eyeno I tended to take classes where I could get good grades and almost forgot the original purpose of going to college. I will prioritize what I want to learn from now on. Thanks for ur advice!