Humour vs Humiliation

We've all receive private messages from time to time that make us question humanity, laugh, or wonder whether the person has misplaced their last functioning brain cell.

But before sharing someone's message publicly for laughs, perhaps we should consider two things.

Firstly, are we giving someone and their questionable behaviour more attention than they deserve?
Secondly, are we calling out the behaviour, or simply humiliating the person behind it?

We rarely know who's on the other side of the screen, what their circumstances are, or what prompted them to reach out. Yes, some messages are inappropriate, some are ridiculous, and we're perfectly entitled to reject, block, or call out bad behaviour.

But there's a difference between laughing at a situation and turning someone into the punchline.

Humour doesn't have to come at the expense of someone's dignity, honour and respect. We can be witty without being cruel, and firm without being humiliating.

So, before posting that screenshot or reply for everyone to laugh at, ask yourself: Am I raising awareness, or am I simply making another human being the entertainment?

We don't owe everyone our attention, but we can still afford them our dignity.

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Fertilization · 36-40, F

Honestly, I think we sometimes give these things far more importance than they deserve. It’s a virtual world, and you’re bound to encounter all kinds of people and messages here. Not every inappropriate message needs a public post, a complaint, or an audience. Sometimes, the simplest response is to ignore, block, and move on with your life. Why give a random stranger so much of your time and energy? The internet is full of all kinds of people; you can’t control what others do, but you can choose what deserves your attention. Not everything deserves a reaction, let alone a public discussion.

InfoTunaBotTheReturn

If you message someone in a disrespectful manner then you forgo the right to respect in return. If you make a grossly inappropriate approach to somebody they have every right to humiliate you. Too many people online act decent in the main forum and like depraved weirdos in private messages. I would certainly agree that humiliation is not appropriate for a genuine approach by somebody. However, if the approach is one of unsolicited sexual messaging or of verbal abuse then all bets are off and humiliation is valid.

Eidolon · M

@InfoTunaBotTheReturn
I fully agree... there's a difference between a genuine approach and outright harassment. Nobody should have to tolerate unsolicited sexual messages or abuse, and we have every right to call out such behaviour.
It's one thing about exposing misconduct to protect others, and another about not exposing someone purely for public ridicule.
There's a difference between holding someone accountable and humiliating them for entertainment.
Someone else's lack of decency doesn't have to dictate our own.
Humiliating people publicly is a form a bullying entirely on it's own.

InfoTunaBotTheReturn

@Eidolon If someone approaches with respect and decency then I agree that they don't deserve humiliation and it's rare that I've ever seen that happen on here. If they approach in a grossly inappropriate manner then I have no sympathy for them and I'm fine with them being humiliated. There should be no safe haven for disgusting behaviour and harassment is worthy of ridicule. There is a rule that protects members anyway. You are not allowed to post negatively about a named member. If you post a private message you have to blank out the username.

Caleidoscope · F

People are more reckless online .
Usually they target weak for their entertainment .I say let it go .Not everyone deserves to be treated with dignity.Specially those who hurt people every now and then .They’re low life.

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