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Why No More Monkeys Evolved Into Humans

Once upon a time in a dense jungle, a group of monkeys were hanging out on a tree, munching bananas and watching humans argue about taxes, deadlines, and whether pineapple belongs on pizza.

One curious little monkey asked the elder, “Grandpa, didn’t you say humans evolved from monkeys? So why aren’t we evolving too?”

The old monkey chuckled and replied, “We were next in line… but then we saw humans stuck in traffic, working 9 to 5, and paying bills just to afford overpriced coffee. We had a meeting. Bananas were passed around. And we voted unanimously to stay monkeys.”

From that day on, evolution got a polite “no thanks” from the jungle committee. They figured tree-swinging, sunbathing, and free fruit were way better than office chairs and spreadsheets.

And that, kids, is why monkeys stopped evolving into humans
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rachelsj · 22-25, F
Funny i liked it
FreddieUK · 70-79, M
That's the best scientific story I've heard ever...or at least today. 😀
YoMomma ·
Personally i believe they never did..
And that's not what evolution says, but ok.
FreddieUK · 70-79, M
@SomeMichGuy But the theory of evolution would have us believe that monkeys cannot talk, have discussions and vote by banana. I prefer a more entertaining version. 😄
Jake966 · 56-60, M
They never evolved into humans in the first place . We were divinely and wonderfully made by God
katydidnt · 61-69, F
And monkeys know better than to have pet monkeys.
They decided monkey's were smarter than humans
in alot of respects, the monkeys are way way better off staying monkeys. LOL
FreddieUK · 70-79, M
@MayorOfCrushtown Yep. They never have trouble finding a parking space.
@FreddieUK they dont have to worry about rent, car insurance, filing taxes, etc.
FreddieUK · 70-79, M
@MayorOfCrushtown They've got it made, those monkeys. I wonder if I can transition to being one? 🤣
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