Good morning Bots and Perverts. Your accent is terrible so today you will be learning how to speak with a Cornish twang. To level you up.
A fine greeting to both friends and strangers is Wasson? meaning What’s going on.
You might have lots going on in you life - it doesn’t matter though because the only acceptable response to Wasson? Is Not much, you?
An alternative greeting is Alright? pronounced alroyt. The same word is the only acceptable reply.
Wasson, shag? Is not a request for sex but how you greet a friend or shag/shagger
And if you’re super happy to see someone, like a friend returning from the bar with a tray full of pints of cider you could say GEDDON ME BEWTY!
If you like something it’s Ansome, if you really like it, it’s bleddy Ansome
Guys, if you see one of us Cornish birds and you fancy a tumble with her you’d say to your buddy Phwoar, some maid
Dreckly This word roughly translates as “it will happen when it happens.” This generally explains the Cornish attitude and pace of life. And used when asking when the next bus is, how long will it take to cook, what time are you arriving somewhere or when a US school shooting will finally be one too many.
Tourists, visiting royalty and anyone not from Cornwall are Emmets
Say you don’t like someone, if they are grumpy they’re are Teasy. If they are a prick they are a tuss. So if you’re in a bar and you hear someone call you a teasy tuss, start running to the nearest exit.
With all other English words just try to sound like a pirate of a hobbit and you’re about there.
So buy us a cider and a pasty, and enjoy…
You might have lots going on in you life - it doesn’t matter though because the only acceptable response to Wasson? Is Not much, you?
An alternative greeting is Alright? pronounced alroyt. The same word is the only acceptable reply.
Wasson, shag? Is not a request for sex but how you greet a friend or shag/shagger
And if you’re super happy to see someone, like a friend returning from the bar with a tray full of pints of cider you could say GEDDON ME BEWTY!
If you like something it’s Ansome, if you really like it, it’s bleddy Ansome
Guys, if you see one of us Cornish birds and you fancy a tumble with her you’d say to your buddy Phwoar, some maid
Dreckly This word roughly translates as “it will happen when it happens.” This generally explains the Cornish attitude and pace of life. And used when asking when the next bus is, how long will it take to cook, what time are you arriving somewhere or when a US school shooting will finally be one too many.
Tourists, visiting royalty and anyone not from Cornwall are Emmets
Say you don’t like someone, if they are grumpy they’re are Teasy. If they are a prick they are a tuss. So if you’re in a bar and you hear someone call you a teasy tuss, start running to the nearest exit.
With all other English words just try to sound like a pirate of a hobbit and you’re about there.
So buy us a cider and a pasty, and enjoy…
