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How do I even bring this up?

I have a “friend”. Never once have we ever argued or been enemies. Every interaction we’ve ever had has been either joyful, playful, or at least respectful (but serious).

Here’s the problem. The only time I ever see her anymore is at the restaurant where she works, with me as her customer. She tells me her work dates/times and asks me to come back.

She’s told me numerous times “I’ll unblock you on Snapchat” (whole other story; and no, I don’t press her to do it—she brings it up) but she never has.

So, I get the impression she just wants to see me for the tips because I always tip my servers, like, 50-100%.

For awhile I just stopped showing up at her work but it still bugs me. I want to bring this up to her and get closure. I just don’t know how, without it sounding harsh and getting her angry.

FYI I am aware that she may just want to keep us as work friends (well, HER work) but that’s not what she says. I want it to be clear.

Please pay attention to the details before you criticize me, Internet. 🙄
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BananaBrown · 41-45, F
She has you blocked on social media? Doesn’t sound very friendly, regardless of what she says to your face:/
Not criticizing, just thinking maybe you deserve a better kind of friend.
@BananaBrown Haha I know you’re not criticizing me. Thanks.
@BananaBrown btw I deserved to get blocked lol but she didn’t have to tell me she would unblock me and then not do it.
BananaBrown · 41-45, F
@SinlessOnslaught Yeah, that seems unnecessary.
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@waleskinder Good idea
Carissimi · F
You can’t bring this up at her place of work. You could say, you’d like to meet somewhere because you like to discuss your friendship, or whatever, but don’t discuss it at the restaurant. Seems like she’s lost interest in the friendship, and tipping 50-100%? Well, I’d want you to come back frequently, if you are tipping that much.
@Carissimi People aren’t gonna be listening in the restaurant or anything.
Carissimi · F
It’s your choice, but a place of work is not appropriate. Her focus is on her job, not getting into deep - and possibly awkward - conversations of a personal nature. It’s not professional, so better offsite. If she doesn’t agree to meet with you, then you have your answer. I’m sorry, but it seems like she’s lost interest. @SinlessOnslaught
@Carissimi Yeah 😕
yeronlyman · 51-55, M
Not worth the hassle
@yeronlyman My brain operates at 500% power. Everything is worth the hassle to me lol.
yeronlyman · 51-55, M
@SinlessOnslaught i understand man
SW-User
YOU FUCKING PERV!! Jk.. in your own words , what do u think your relationship outta be .. like you said, maybe she just likes the tips and trusts you to give you her work schedule .. maybe you can .. ask her to hang out sometime .. you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take mister .. idk if this helps any lol
@SW-User It helped. Thought provoking.

Ummmm, I think our relationship ought to be what it used to be, hanging out in her car during her breaks and smoking weed lol.

 
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