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What advice would you give me...

So iv been close friends with this guy for about 7 months. I have feelings or him and basically he said likes me too but he is not ready for a relationship. So right now we are friends with benefits. I found it hard to be friends with benefits about 2 months ago so I cut him off after an argument and we didn't speak for 3 weeks. I found that really hard and I just didn't seem to be happy without being friends with him. I then apologised and we are close friends again, except we still kiss and stuff. The past 2/3 weeks I have just accepted being friends with benefits because I really don't want to lose him as a friend again (but we both find it hard to just chill without kissing/cuddling ect). Right now I feel is it as if I can be close friends with him (plus benefits) or not friends at all, because it is hard for me to hang out with him/have deep conversations and block out my feelings/affection for him. I cant wait for him to be ready for a relationship because that might be years, but I know I deserve better than to just be 'friend with benefits' (he is a really nice person don't get me wrong). I don't know what to do because I tried cutting him off and I thought that would help but I missed him as a friend so much.
What should I do?? x
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LyricalOne · F
Cut him off but make it stick this time. You’re wasting time that could be used finding someone who is ready.
thatgirllllll · 26-30
@LyricalOne But I tried that for about a month and I just wasn't happy for so long. He is one of the few people I can talk about anything with, a very close friend.
LyricalOne · F
@thatgirllllll It’ll pass. You deserve better. Your “very close friend” didn’t come after you during that time, correct?
thatgirllllll · 26-30
@LyricalOne Thank you x