I think it must be really hard for extremely attractive people to make friends
I always feel sorry for them and wonder how lonely they might be
61-69, M
hartfire · 70-79
I think friendships depend more on personality.
There are so many kinds of people that there's almost always a few we can click with, and some of those can grow into deep friendships.
I believe the keys are to show up regularly at places where people with similar interests hang out,
and then put spend regular time in one-to-one connection. The longer it lasts, the better it gets.
It's always an exploration, so it doesn't always work out.
We have to allow for differences in needs and capacities and find creative ways to find the balance.
There are so many kinds of people that there's almost always a few we can click with, and some of those can grow into deep friendships.
I believe the keys are to show up regularly at places where people with similar interests hang out,
and then put spend regular time in one-to-one connection. The longer it lasts, the better it gets.
It's always an exploration, so it doesn't always work out.
We have to allow for differences in needs and capacities and find creative ways to find the balance.
atlantic59 · 61-69, M
@hartfire that's great but what about if you don't have a favourable personality? I bought a flawed personality from an unscrupulous dealer on the wrong end of town when I was young and naive and was forced to live with it for a long time -much to the detriment of all who attempted to know me.
hartfire · 70-79
@atlantic59
There's no such thing as an unflawed personality.
Think of it. Nature endows us with anger to defend ourselves when attacked, fear to help us know when to hide, camouflage or run, lust to incite us to make babies, love to help them grow, grief to adjust to loss... every emotion has its life-nurturing reason for arising.
It's only when our conditioning warps our natural response that problems start.
The motions are not wrong in themselves. They just signals we humans often misread.
Alas, we are born without manuals.
I believe most ideas of "perfection" are just constantly shifting fashions and values, and changes in response to our experiences.
The only kind of true perfection is found in maths and nowhere else in the universe
changes in response to our experiences.
I guess when we meet new people who might become friends, we need to expect that we''l have flaws on each side. And part of relationship is growing to understand them and creatively finding how to allow each to be who they truely are.
We discover one another's needs, preferences, boundaries, interests, abilities, disabilities and so forth - and find countless ways to mutually nurture wellbeing.
There's no such thing as an unflawed personality.
Think of it. Nature endows us with anger to defend ourselves when attacked, fear to help us know when to hide, camouflage or run, lust to incite us to make babies, love to help them grow, grief to adjust to loss... every emotion has its life-nurturing reason for arising.
It's only when our conditioning warps our natural response that problems start.
The motions are not wrong in themselves. They just signals we humans often misread.
Alas, we are born without manuals.
I believe most ideas of "perfection" are just constantly shifting fashions and values, and changes in response to our experiences.
The only kind of true perfection is found in maths and nowhere else in the universe
changes in response to our experiences.
I guess when we meet new people who might become friends, we need to expect that we''l have flaws on each side. And part of relationship is growing to understand them and creatively finding how to allow each to be who they truely are.
We discover one another's needs, preferences, boundaries, interests, abilities, disabilities and so forth - and find countless ways to mutually nurture wellbeing.
CountScrofula · 46-50, M
atlantic59 · 61-69, M
@CountScrofula will it hit independent theatres, -it could be a good documentary
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atlantic59 · 61-69, M
@Akimbo75 yes, and there seats the life-long struggle
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Lilnonames · F
[media=https://youtu.be/Am38jAK38DU]