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Would u still be friends with them ?

If u told a friend after hearing their issues and problems and always being there to hear them out. That u were feeling super down to the point of self-deletion at times and they just read it & out of all the messages they just happen to leave that one on read for 2 hours & so you double text them and they respond back quick that they were busy but instead it causes a fight, so you decide to give in and let it be that they were busy, but then nothing is addressed about how you felt, so you give them the open chance by telling them again that, that is how ur feeling and again they don't say anything about it, and just claim their now upset & ignore you again.

Would you still remain their friend or discard them, because you feel they don't care & it's
not reciporcated?

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BlueVeins · 22-25

I would stay friends. Bad behavior on their part, but ultimately I wouldn't cut ties over a single incident, short of something crazy like them hitting me. IDK though, if you just feel bad around them now, no sense dragging it out.

Blondily · F

Well at that point you wouldn't have any reason to be a friend to them any longer. They used your shoulder yet when you needed theirs, they ghosted you. I'd never speak to them ever again. And if they finally came around and said hey how's it going, I certainly wouldn't reciprocate! Karma!

NativePortlander1970

@Blondily They're called fair weathers, I have them within both sides of my families, my mother being one of the worst.

Blondily · F

@NativePortlander1970 I get treated the same by the hubs side. Doesnt bother me tho! 😊

Pinkstarburst · 51-55, F

There are different degrees of friendships. This person does not reciprocate the emotional effort you have for them. It may not be that they don't care. They may not know how to support someone struggling…they may feel inadequate in this way. It doesn't make them a terrible person or friend. It is just a different friend dynamic. Hopefully you have other people in your life who can support you during these low times.

MsSwan

I don't know but I would definitely reevaluate the friendship.

deadgerbil · 26-30, M

Time to show them the door

Different · 31-35, M

@deadgerbil i shut that door and locked it haha

KingofBones1 · 46-50, M

Friend should always account for each other and how they feel. Being busy is one thing but constantly ignoring somebody or not caring how things make them feel inside is a simple sign of them not giving a f*** and being so self absorbed they don't have room for you in their lives. If that is the case don't leave them any room either

Sapio · 51-55, M

I ended a friendship for that exact reason. I was there for them but they were never there for me.

I feel that in your case, you should indeed reconsider the friendship and distance yourself. Because the person you speak comes across as selfish.

Different · 31-35, M

@Sapio idk if i can remain friends with anyone selfish cause i feel i out out what i expect in friendships from the gate

mooncrest02 · 31-35, F

Discard them..

Different · 31-35, M

@mooncrest02 i did :)

Roundandroundwego · 61-69

I've actually dumped the last living relatives I have because my concerns are never important and they don't hide their utter contempt for me. It's not like you have a choice whether others are any dang good.

This comment is hidden. Show Comment

SomeMichGuy · M

Idk.

I think it is easy to ASK how someone is, but hard to RESPOND when such a very dark answer arises.

I can imagine the person foundering when considering how to respond.

But they should at least tell you to call the national crisis hotline.

CrazyMusicLover · 31-35

That is a weird reaction from a friend if you tell them you think of such things. The least they can do is to send back some generic words that are said in such situations.

Different · 31-35, M

@CrazyMusicLover thats exactly what i thought

seaglass · F

I may not tell them outright and I may not clue them in by blocking or talking to mutual friends about it, but I would divorce them in my heart and mind. For all future intents and purposes, they are void.

Rilyn · 31-35, F

Look. You want my opinion? My honest opinion? Youre in the wrong place. If you really need to reach out call the right professionals theyll guide you.

mooncrest02 · 31-35, F

Also Im sorry you feel that way and that your friend wasn't there for you how s/he should've been. ♡

Iwillwait · M

I'm not sure to what level I would allow myself to "feel" self-entitled.

It's harder to remove my own feelings/opinions when it's "Me," that's hurting.

It does take a level of emotional maturity to do, however, if your messages were pretty dire sounding like you're in a very bad, vulnerable space, and there was no acknowledging of your pain or offer of concern, this may be a "Tell-tale-sign," that your friend is not of the same level as you believed they are.

Jenny1234 · 51-55, F

What you texted was something pretty serious so I mean a best friend or a true friend would give that immediate attention.

I would never drop a friend unless it was absolutely necessary but in this case, I might just put some distance for a little while until you think think about it for for a while and see where you wanna go with it

Different · 31-35, M

@Jenny1234 i always come across this with people as of late

Jenny1234 · 51-55, F

@Different I’m sorry to hear that

Nebula · 41-45, F

Oh yeah, I've known people like that, would call me every day and talk about their issues for hours. The one time I needed to talk about something they were "too busy" every time I brought it up so I never talked to them again. They can f themselves

Different · 31-35, M

@Nebula yeah thats how i am, we just csnt be friends if u want a one sided resltionship lol

Nebula · 41-45, F

@Different it's more like they are treating you like a free therapist

Selah ·

Something as serious as that would make me block them once I came to my senses lol

Someone who always needs support isn't going to be the person you can lean on. You have to be more aware of the dynamic and manage your expectations w people.

Different · 31-35, M

@Selah yeah im pretty fast to crash out and block and burn a bridge with something like thst i just expected reciprocation.

OlderSometimesWiser · F

Depends on my history with the person. If it was a one time kinda thing, I’d still move forward with them. If it’s a pattern of behavior, I’d back away.

InHeaven · F

Probably not. It must be reciprocated 🤔

caccoon · 36-40

It is entirely up to you, and I think you should choose whatever will make you feel best.

Personally I have learned that some friends I do not talk about certain things with.

Friends that are supportive, I do. it's just learning which friends have the capacity for it, and making sure I can also be that person for yhem when they need

But yeah, some people have trouble with difficult emotions and they can't be that friend. And that's okay too

Different · 31-35, M

@caccoon my thing is how can they expect my shoulder and for me to give, but they cant and wont expect an ending to the friendship. I have gotten to the point with people is if they cant reciporcate what i give them and what fhey expect then i should burn the bridge

caccoon · 36-40

@Different yeah! Or even just practicing boundaries and only being available to them for what doesn't inconvenience you

Anyway, I hope you come to a resolution that will make you feel best 💙💙

Moneyonmymind · 31-35, M

Hmm this one’s a bit tough yes people have life’s and we don’t always know what they’re dealing with. But at the same time a text like that needs attention and just being left on read is..😒

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