Friendship is fleeting

I have a woman that I love not as a lover but as a brother and so far she has been a true blessing to me I think to myself how long will it be till something happens to break our brotherhood or till we disconnect from one another. Last person I accepted like this completely betrayed me and whats funny is I knew that they would but I allowed them to do it because I hated myself. I allowed him to treat me so badly because of how much I hated myself and I still hate myself. I just wondering how long it will last.