Sometimes I feel like I am an asshole.

Well, I think people are right, and nothing good comes from friends with benefits, and someone is eventually hurt. Apparently, she wants something more than that, and I cannot be in a relationship right now. She knows that, but I guess it's not that easy for either of us to be normal friends at this point.

A while ago, she said we have to be normal friends, and I agreed since I am starting to feel bad and guilty because of how she feels and what she wants from us. She came to my place some days ago to watch a movie together, but the next thing I knew, we were in bed. I don't even remember how it happened.

It's becoming like a cycle. There is some distance between us for some time, but we end up being FWB again after a while. I want it to stop. But I think the only way is we stop being friends, and it's not that easy.

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SW-User

Whats is that she dislikes about how you are now? Your need to be with others or that you don't have feelings for her or what. Or simply the "tittle" of relationship??
And you say you don't remember how it happened the you ended up in bed 😂😂😂😂😂 innocent child??

Seems quite simple, if can't be normal friends or enjoy what you have already it's better to drift away. Or just talk rarely without needing to see each other, like kinda distant, but looks you like her too or not??

People really suck.

LookingForTheSummer · 31-35, M

@SW-User We are obviously more than friends, but we are also not in a relationship. We don't know what we are, and she doesn't like this. We tried being normal friends, and it didn't work. She stopped talking to me for some weeks; again, it didn't work because she ended up texting me again.
I do like her, but I can't be in a committed relationship right now. At the same time, she doesn't make it easy for us to stop talking or even be normal friends. I admit I also have some faults because I don't reject her.

I know it sounds somewhat funny or even dumb that I say I don't remember how we ended up in bed. Lol. But it's the truth. It was like my mind was blank for a brief time. I don't intend to turn this into an Adult post, but I remember us watching the movie, and the next thing I remember is being in bed and taking our clothes off like there is no tomorrow.

I agree. People are stupid. Every one of us is stupid in a way.

SW-User

@LookingForTheSummer I see. Well in this case, since you've been in that dynamic for some time, it's not that she doesn't know you won't commit and she still wants to be with you, I wouldn't mind that much. Maybe have again that conversation with her, about Wether she thinks she can accept things as they are because you can't just change for her, and if she decides to walk away, and find something different then ok. If she stays it's her choice too. Just like if she tells you, don't have sex with me if you don't want a relationship with me, you gotta not have sex simply. Be responsible. That's all the responsibility about it. Now if you can stay ok without minding it it's different.

I said people suck cause rarely is a good balance about anything.

SW-User

@LookingForTheSummer and for not having sex its as simple as avoiding certain circumstances 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃
But it's likely you like that part. Just think about the situation with a clear mind.

LookingForTheSummer · 31-35, M

@SW-User I know you are right, and the best thing to do is probably have a serious talk about it and set some boundaries. But as you can see, it's not that easy or simple. As I mentioned, she said she wanted us to be normal friends, but apparently, we can't even watch a movie and stay civilized.
And you talk about avoiding certain circumstances. Then it means we should meet only in public places, I think. 😅