I went out for a coffee with this friend of mine I hadn't seen since summer

@SW-User she said she would order herself after him

He took it upon himself to disregard what she said and ASSUME he knew what was best for her

@WaryWitchWandering She said the place was busy so he obviously ordered for her so she doesn't has to struggle with the crowd to order again. It's a very normal, nice and polite move, idk why you have to ASSUME that he did it just to "disregard" her??? That's such a terrible thing to assume.. I bet you would've also assumed that he's a selfish dude if he ordered for himself only..

Men always damned if we do, damned if we don't

@SW-User no he didn’t ask what she would like… just ordered something for her without even asking

Would you like if you and I went somewhere and it was busy, and I went up to order and just ordered your food or drink for you (even though you said you would place your order after) with out even asking what you like or want.

What if I ordered something you hated? Or something that makes you ill? Should you be thanking me and ever so grateful?

It’s not anything to Do with gender here… just stop it

@WaryWitchWandering Personally, I'm not very picky and actually I usually ask people to recommend something for me, so I would totally love that, and even if it turned out to be something I hate, I would try to pretend that I liked it so they would feel appreciated ( although if they asked of I like it, I might then let them know that it's not my favourite ) And seriously tho, who doesn't like hotchocolate in a cold weather! 😂

@SW-User well not everyone is like you. Nothing wrong with being picky or being more open like yourself

If he wanted to get her order he simply could have asked “what are you getting?” And then ordered it.

I would be irritated if someone just ordered me something with no clue after I had said “I’ll place my order after”, I would feel obligated to then consume it (even if I don’t enjoy it or truly wanted something else)

This is of course different if you weren’t expecting to get anything at all, or if you want to be surprised/have a recommendation. But she already knew what she wanted and had said “I’ll get it after”

I don’t think she’s being “mean” is all I’m getting at.

@WaryWitchWandering Ok maybe she's not mean, but still, imagine being called rude for literally buying someone a drink! This is so weird, unfair and concerning. It is very obviously about always assuming bad faith in whatever a man does or doesn't to a women. ( Or maybe I'm just perceiving it this way because I've been struggling with that ) but if she called him dumb instead, or something that didn't assume that he did it in bad faith, I would have not complained.

@WaryWitchWandering I hope she doesn't take my comment personally tho. I don't really know her anyway

@SW-User no, it's rude and fucked up to assume to thi k you know what someone else should have. As if he's in charge of what she consumes. Just because you have a dick, doesn't mean you have a right to control other people's choices.

There could be reasons also for not wanting hot chocolate: diet, lactose intolerance, etc. all of which are frankly no one's business but hers.

@basilfawlty89 ok simp

@SW-User so treating women with basic respect is now "simping"? Are you part of the incel community?

I happen to know Pepsi incidentally, we've been friends for years.

@SW-User again it had nothing to do with gender

@basilfawlty89 Maybe you can call it inconsiderate. But "rude and fucked up"? Are you even serious?

@SW-User vegans, ppl allergic to chocolate, people that hate chocolate, people with dairy intolerance, people that fast, people that don's consume milk for health or any othersl reason, people that don't like sugar, me, regular people that just don't like liquid chocolate

@SW-User 😂 insecure child.

@greensnacks this.

@greensnacks The point is that it's unexpectable. In general most people like hot chocolate, especially in cold weather so it was a reasonable assumption, even tho it failed.

You're missing all the points and instead pointing out some irrelevant facts. How smart!

@SW-User I'm not missing anything. You and that guy are assuming shit, here lies the issue. Even more so, SHE STATED that [b]SHE[/b] will order, and he still assumed shit.
It's not about intelligence, smartpants, its about reading social cues.So, i guess it's about intelligence. Emotional intelligence.

And overall respecting women. Would he have done that if she was a guy?
[i]"Hey bro, I ordered you a hot chocolate bc you're skinny, and you seem like that type of guy that'd drink that. Even tho you said you'd order yourself. "
[/i]

Gtfo, no one does that in the western world
Check yourself before you accuse someone of being "mean" (as per YOUR BOOK OF KINDNESS) and fight everyone in the comments, women especially, that told you it's not okay to make their decisions if they don't want to.

(not to bring in the social issues of men literally OWNING women even today in some countries and making every decision for them, social, religious, financial, sexual etc)

Maybe listen next time what you're been directly told in your language

@greensnacks I think regardless of gender I would have been annoyed

Like… wtf… cmon I said I would get it after

@greensnacks I just don’t like ANYONE assuming things for/about me and making a decision FOR me based off the assumptions

I can choose for myself…. And if it were to be kind, Why not check in with me first? Why not ask what I want/need

It seems this person had a lot of assumptions/ideas about @PepsiColaP to begin with

@greensnacks I'm too mature to fight everyone in the comments, I even mentioned that I hope PepsiCola doesn't take my comment personally. I just respond to buthurts like you in a similar tone to yours, or not really, I have more to do with my life than read your long comment.

And I literally had a female friend voluntarily buy me a drink I'm allergic to, and since men must always validate women, I still drink it anyway and appreciate the gesture

@SW-User keep on not listening, way to go.

I'm ordering u a drink and u gonna drink it

@greensnacks I agree that I am indeed not trying to listen to you. But it's nothing but fair since you attacked me directly without trying to listen first 🤷

At least I'm not childish enough to attack back

@SW-User "You're missing all the points and instead pointing out some irrelevant facts. [b][i]How smart![/b][/i]"

What's this then? Love, kindness,genuine statement?

Lmao. Bye.

@greensnacks yes

@greensnacks I'll take the drink tho