I Do Not Like To Wear Shoes In The House

I choose to wear them (or slippers) in case of things like needles or other sharp objects on the floor. I hate guests taking off their shoes - first they clutter up the hall with their smelly shoes, then they rot the carpet with their smelly socks. I say, unless you've trodden in something, keep your shoes on unless you've brought slippers to change into.

I think they probably take “the floor is lava” very seriously

Me too.