I shouldn't assume things

Last week was so incredibly hard. We had to say goodbye to Jeremy, and there really aren’t words for how painful that was, especially for the kids.

It was supposed to be my ex-wife’s weekend with the boys, but after everything that happened, of course they wanted to stay here with us. She told me she would see them the next weekend, so I honestly thought she meant this weekend.

I texted her to check, and she told me no, it wasn’t her weekend. She would get them next weekend, like normal.

I guess I just assumed she would want to see them. I thought maybe she would want to hug them, check on them, or just be there for them after losing Jeremy. But she hasn’t seen them or even FaceTimed them since we lost him.

And that hurts more than I can really explain, because the kids are hurting too. They’re trying to understand why Daddy is gone, while also trying to understand who is still going to be there for them.

Link especially has been worried. He keeps wondering if she’s upset with him because he had an accident the last time he was there. He’s just a little boy carrying so much right now, and it breaks my heart that he’s even thinking about whether someone is mad at him when what he really needs is to know that he is loved.

I wish I could take all of this away from them. I wish they didn’t have to wonder who is coming, who is leaving, or whether they did something wrong.

They’ve already lost so much. They just need people to show up, love them, and remind them that none of this is their fault. ❤‍🩹