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I took my son to the cemetery today to be with his mom.

My son is a very special young man. He was born with hydrocephalus (excess fluid in the cranial cavity). There was so much fluid, it compressed parts of his brain and his optic nerves, causing severe cerebral palsy and cortical blindness. The scar tissue from all the brain surgeries left him with epilepsy which has been responsible for some very scary and dangerous seizures requiring ambulance rides to Children's Hospital emergency where they've had to stop his heart so they can pump it for him.

We all build fluid in our cranial cavities. It's the fluid that cushions our brains from banging around in our skulls, but we have a drain that keeps it circulating and flowing out. My son's drain never developed, along with his corpus callosum, which is a bundle of nerves that connects to the left hemisphere of the brain to the right hemisphere, allowing them to coordinate and function as one unit.

As a result of All My Sons specialties, he can't walk, he has a very scant verbal communication skills, he can hardly see. He's legally blind. He can't use the toilet. He won't eat. I feed him through a G-tube come in on top of everything else he's highly autistic. So the bit of communication he does do, he does a lot. He doesn't over and over and over and over and over.

He's also got really bad scoliosis, one kidney, he's had both his hips replaced due to severe hip dysplasia. He's had a few other intestinal surgeries as well. I'm not saying any of this to drum up any sort of sappy pity or sympathy for jake. He's tough as nails. And happier than most of the people you've ever met here or especially on Reddit.. the only reason I'm explaining his condition is because it's interesting when compared to the rest of our day.

We'd spend about 20 minutes or half hour with his mom, completely alone. Nobody anywhere near our vicinity. . When we were leaving and I was loading him onto his seat that lifts him into the van, he started talking about sitting with Linda. I wasn't sure I heard him right so I asked him to repeat it. He said I want to sit with Linda (Winda). I asked him who Linda was and he kept repeating, "wanna sit with winda.. ...w-w-with winda, with winda. W-w-wanna si-si-si-sit with winda. W-WITH WINDA! W-W-WITH WWWINDA!

There was nobody else physically in the vicinity of me or Jake the whole time we were visiting. He talked about Linda all the way home. I have no idea who the fuck he met at the cemetery. He's never talked about Linda before. He's never said that name before, ever in his whole life.

By the time we got home, he was going on about how enthusiasticly she had greeted him and he was matching her enthusiasm with his replies to her.."Hoy, Winda! H-h-h-hoyyy, W-Wwinda! ..h-h-h-h-sit with W-W-Winda! Ghhhhhhh!

Oh yea, on top of everything else he's got a mad stutter

I think I'll take him back there maybe this weekend and start reading the names on the headstones to see if there are any Lindas, and I'll definitely be sleeping with him in his room tonight to make sure Linda's not a bad influence on my man. But so far she makes him really happy whoever she is and according to him he makes her happy. He's been talking about her all night

I recently saw a podcast where the guest was talking about people with Autism having the ability to do what Jake themed to be doing today. I wasn't completely paying attention and wasn't sure if they mentioned any science behind it
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meggie · F
I feel for you both. I hope it goes well and you get a break at times too.
Jayciedubb · 56-60, M
@meggie thanks. My Philosophy is that we'll bee ok until we are no more. Every day is a good day. ..some are just better than others.

Ive been caring for him every day of his life, with few exceptions. His twin brother was very helpful before he moved out and his mother had her routine with him every night.

Aside from the totally helpless part and needing his diapers changed and the feedings (which are a breeze ever since we gave in to the notion of the G-tube), he's actually very independent. As soon as i get him all dialed in and fresh and fed and entertained, he'll usually give me some side-eye action and tell me, "door." That means he wants me to use it and be on the other side of it when im done, until further notice
meggie · F
@Jayciedubb you are a great parent and he sounds a character!! A lot of people with autism are cleverer than we think, but sometimes struggle to make us aware. Maybe he gets up to mischief when you go out the door.