dimfok · 26-30, M
In general I agree. I might also add that even if you’re a grandparent, aunt, uncle or whatever, the parents are the ones to decide for their child so you can politely STFU 😇
I accept that the majority of parents feel this way,
and that this ethic is both normal and customary everywhere in the West.
I also accept that shouting at any kid is abusive - unless of course it's an urgent cry of "STOP!" or similar to prevent an imminent car accident or some such.
However, I have sometimes intervened to say, "You never get your needs met by throwing a tantrum" -- and it works spectacularly well. The toddler is totally ignoring its parent's exasperated attempts to calm them down (or punish them). But when I as a stranger quietly intervene, it shocks the child so much - that a stranger is on the parent's side - that they shut up and actually listen. It's amazing how it totally transforms the situation. And I wouldn't be surprised if it had turned out to be a moment of dawning understanding for the kid.
and that this ethic is both normal and customary everywhere in the West.
I also accept that shouting at any kid is abusive - unless of course it's an urgent cry of "STOP!" or similar to prevent an imminent car accident or some such.
However, I have sometimes intervened to say, "You never get your needs met by throwing a tantrum" -- and it works spectacularly well. The toddler is totally ignoring its parent's exasperated attempts to calm them down (or punish them). But when I as a stranger quietly intervene, it shocks the child so much - that a stranger is on the parent's side - that they shut up and actually listen. It's amazing how it totally transforms the situation. And I wouldn't be surprised if it had turned out to be a moment of dawning understanding for the kid.
hippyjoe1955 · 70-79, M
ChipmunkErnie · 70-79, M
If the parent can't control the kid SOMEONE has got to yell at the brat -- AND probably at the irresponsible parent, too..
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@ChipmunkErnie My mother always loved complaining about other parents not raising their kids right, while pretty much ignoring my older brothers and myself.
ChipmunkErnie · 70-79, M
@NativePortlander1970 Someone should have yelled at her. ;)
@ChipmunkErnie She was yelled at by others all the time for starting shit all the time, she once told me a few years ago that we moved 17 times in 12 years, claiming each and every forced move was someone else's fault.
Even the grandparents, aunts, and uncles, should not scream at them.