Custody battle help

Hi everyone , if anyone can give me advice I will be very detailed. My daughter whose 8 lives with her dad we have shared custody. Iv been in an abusive relationship for the 4 years as to why she ended up with her dad now. I have another child he stays with me and his dad in jail. Now my daughters dad is trying to have my daughter live with him , and I just get visitation but I want her to be in my care because I haven’t been with her in 4 years behind my toxic ex whose in jail. Now and has been in and out behind me. My daughters dad has told me he doesn’t want my daughter with me because I just can’t make the right decisions and that he feels I can’t be a mother to her because of my past , I had an abusive relationship with him as well so at that time I struggled but my daughter was living with me up until this abusive relationship of 4 years he told me he’s gonna get a layer so she can never live with me again. I haven’t been to court because I’m trying to move so my ex can’t find me when gets out of jail . I feel like I’m going to never have my daughter again even though I’m working hard with no help , he even said he doesn’t want my daughter on my care because I’m going to have her baby sit.. how the hell is that gonna be . I don’t do drugs or drink i I’m not unstable but I am worried he might have a strong case to keep my daughter from me . Mind you a year ago I called acs on him because he hit my daughter so hard in the mouth he busted her lip , he got away with it too because at this time I was in a shelter because my ex stalked me.. my ex even threatened my daughter and her dad , it’s a big mess . I just know I’m not dealing with my ex anymore and I’m nervous that it may take years to get my daughter back behind my past. I don’t know what to do I just miss my child so much

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Torsten · 36-40, M

that sounds like a mess. Did you take any photos of your daughter after she was hit or take her to hospital or anything that there will be records of it?
does her father have legal custody now and not just agreed custody?

How long is your ex in jail and if he will be around once he gets out, is it really a safe environment for your daughter?
Do you have people around that would be a danger to her like as in dating and so on?

As a mother you have all the advantage in family law. So if your daughter at such a young age was taken from you by the court, there must have been a incredible amount going against you and them not feeling your daughter is safe.
If that is the case, you need to fix all of that and make sure your daughter would have a safe home with you and that you have all the tools to raise her.
Without that, you wont win custody and if he has full custody now, you most likely will never get full custody. Best you can hope for is shared

Pillowtalk714 · 31-35, F

@Torsten yes we have shared custody, he has physical custody. The courts understand that I have been in a toxic relationship where i haven’t been able to move so my ex has been arrested multiple times which would make the living situation not safe . I’m trying to move now because it’s hard but I should be leaving this year. Secondly yes I did take pictures of help lip and a video explains what her dad did , till this day she tells me he can be a bit verbally abusive and I can sometime hear him in the tone of his voice. Indeed it’s a mess from choosing the wrong men to date but one thing is I have not even been told im a bad mom or a drug addict or alcoholic. I just don’t have family or support anywhere

Pillowtalk714 · 31-35, F

@Torsten also I am not dating and my ex gets out in a couple weeks which I’m nervous about but I know I will be okay

Torsten · 36-40, M

@Pillowtalk714 so shared custody but he has her most of the time. How often do you see her say a fortnight?
yeah moving i normally hard, but maybe best to focus on that and find a good place that is safe.

do you keep record of everything? like writing down any time you come in contact with her father, if anything ever happens to your daughter. All sorts of stuff like that.
Pictures help but did you report it during that time?

maybe its time to put dating on hold if you havent already.
Courts look down on random people coming in and out of kids lives like that and it looks better for you if in court and you can say that your focus is only on your children and no others except family, friends or close ones will be around her.

Torsten · 36-40, M

@Pillowtalk714 if your ex is out in a couple weeks, prob best to move asap

Pillowtalk714 · 31-35, F

@Torsten I have an advocate and the borough president helping me I’m praying lord

Pillowtalk714 · 31-35, F

@Torsten @Torsten I haven’t seen her much because he stays in a shelter, so I can’t see her often because of their policy of her needing to be with him 24 seven I would have to go to court to get the order modified which I’m doing now but I want to make sure that I get her full-time and yeah I’m not dating. I only been with one guy after my daughters dad because I wanted to be careful who I was getting involved with and I still made the wrong move, which is sad but I’m not dating at all. I’m just focus on my school moving and having my children in a safe environment. I haven’t really recorded much because my daughters died and I don’t speak but the incident where he hit my daughter was from last year when I did have her physically in my care , I let my daughter’s dad take her as a favor because of what I was going through, and he said the only way for him to get an apartment was if he was in a shelter I do regret this decision because it has beat me in the ass.

Torsten · 36-40, M

@Pillowtalk714 I dont think you will ever get full custody at this point and no offence, but damn I though my family law case was messy. It was bad for sure but yeah this sounds like a huge mess.
Is there anything to prove he was violent towards your daughter? not just photos because photos dont show how those injuries occurred. You need actual evidence that he did that, otherwise it will just come across as a blame game type thing.

I hope it works out for you but mostly hope your daughter ends up being okay whatever way it goes

Pillowtalk714 · 31-35, F

@Torsten well yeah I meant to live with me , I probably won’t ever get full custody bcuz I have no support anywhere anyways ,but yeah thank u I hope it works out for the best really , what a mess iv caused

Pillowtalk714 · 31-35, F

@Torsten I actually have videos I spoke to cps about it but they didn’t do anything.. but I didn’t show the courts so I will , ppl may have this bad outlook on me but I just been through a lot this toxic situation was hard to get out of but I have a really good relationship with my daughter .. I always have it’s just unfortunate circumstances

Torsten · 36-40, M

@Pillowtalk714 well again you have the advantage because you are the mother and family law is biased for sure.
In saying that I dont think you will get full custody at this point unless your ex (her father) screws up really bad.
You have a bit going against you though with your other ex and all. I guess good thing on your side is how young your daughter is. That goes in your favor also.

weird cps did not do anything. I wonder if they did a investigation. Did you go to police over it?

Pillowtalk714 · 31-35, F

@Torsten no I should’ve .. I just had so much going on I was pregnant too..I’m happy you been following along some ppl get confused in a mess like this lol bless your soul . Tbh I think my situation was so bad that they just put it under the rug and looked at what was going on with me .. it’s been hell I tell you that much

Pillowtalk714 · 31-35, F

God this is really bad isn’t it . Well I hope someone can take from my situation and myself as well bcuz I never want to go through this ever again