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Should I go to the funeral?

Um hi, first time here so I'm still finding my way around. Anyways, it's almost 2am here and i'm tired and stressed.

Tomorrow is my grandmother's funeral and I really really loved her and we were close but i dont know if i should even go. The problem is that my dad's girlfriend will be there (parents separated a few yrs ago and are now divorced) The thing is, yesterday i went to the wake and paid my respects. My dad had brought his gf and i guess it's confirmed that theyre together because her name was beside his on my grandmother's coffin. But what made me feel hurt was that he NEVER confirmed or informed us (my siblings and I) that they were together (even if we actually alreay knew). He just acts like nothing is wrong!! He even had that audacity to introduce her to us WITHOUT ASKING IF WE WERE OK. That really hurt me and that was heavy for my 12 year old sister. So when he did, I didnt even look at her. Im sorry, i dont want to be rude and i dont really want to hate her but i just feel terrible. I honestly never want to meet or even see her and i know it's quite immature. Another thing that hurt from the wake was that our dad just left us, his mourning kids, there with all these people we dont know and he was with his girlfriend most of the time. I mean i already felt sad about my grandmother's death but he just had to go and do that to make it worse.

So tomorrow (later? Since it's almost 2am now) is the funeral and i dont know if i should go. I do not want to see my dad's girlfriend again and i'm still hurting from a lot of things. My little sister feels the same too actually. But if i dont go, i feel guilty because it's my grandmother right? We were close and i really love her. I dont know what to do and i cant sleep. I feel so conflicted.
My mom says it's ok to not go. But won't people and my other relatives at the funeralthink it's bad? Also i don't want the last memory of my grandmother be her being buried. I want to remember her as i saw her at the wake; peaceful and smiling.

So in short, should I go to my grandmother's funeral but feel angry and terrible because of my dad and his girlfriend? Or not go because I feel too hurt but I'll end up feeling guilty?
I'm so sorry this is so long and personal but I'm so conflicted. Thanks for reading this whole thing.
curiosi · 61-69, F
Your grand mother has no knowledge of you being there or not. Funerals are for the living, to give those in mourning a chance to get together and lift each other up. That is NOT what you are getting, you are made to feel worse when there so what would be the point?
Fernie · F
The funeral has nothing to do with your father and his stuff. It's between you and your Grandmother. Don't not go for those reasons. It's very helpful for people to say a final goodbye to someone they loved. You WILL regret it at some point of you don't go for the reasons you described.
greenmountaingal · 70-79, F
You are not the immature one; your father is. You have nothing to feel guilty about.

Of course you should go. It's not about your insensitive dad and his girlfriend; It's about your grandmother. Focus on that.
This is about her and your love for her.
gurlwatcher22 · 61-69, M
F*** Dad and his floozy.Attend the funeral to remember your grandmother.She was a bigger person and you will be too.You'll always have your memories of her.Attend to honor her as others have said.You'll thank yourself later.
Javik05 · 26-30, M
I think you should go. It would be a dishonour to your grandma not to attend. And if you don't like your dads gf, just ignore them. The funeral is for you grandma, so why should they have the attention?
SW-User
so in short???????????????????????????? damn...........you just wrote a book.. look, you can go and say goodbye to her lifeless body... or go anywhere and cherish her spirit..
billstickers · 36-40, M
you must go you will regret it and carry the guilt for years. besides she would want you there its about showing respect.
I think you should go. Try to keep a low profile until it's over.🙂
SW-User

 
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