One of those nights.
I'm stressed right now. A bunch of things that fell one into another and landed me here. Now everything's Shakey and my mind is wandering...smh.
Plus my ex is back in contact with "the kids" more like just the first born. And it's got me anxious because he's such a big influence.... Everytime he goes around his dad he's a different kid...it takes days for him to get back to normal. All of a sudden he's super serious, easily irritable and stressed out. Acting out.😔 I'm trying to encourage him to enjoy his youth. Yes I want him to take his education and his life choices seriously but at the same time he's 11😶 he has a hard time just relaxing sometimes. Like it takes max effort to chill. Idk guys. I wish his dad was the kind of guy I could lean on for the dad things. Send him off for the weekend or maybe a week at dads house every once in a while. But I don't want my son acting like him. He's got a lot of great things to impart. I used to think even if he wasn't a great husband to me at least he was a good dad to them. But then I started hearing about how different he was behind closed doors. How he'd drill them about things and made them feel like they weren't following God correctly. Or like I was going to lead them all to danger because I didn't care or love them. It's just hard to parent when kids are drenched in fear and insecurity. Smh. He may not have said nothing crazy yet but I worry about how he manipulates their minds sometimes. I don't know what to do.
I know we are going through hard times and I just want to make it better. I wish my hugs could fix it some how
Plus my ex is back in contact with "the kids" more like just the first born. And it's got me anxious because he's such a big influence.... Everytime he goes around his dad he's a different kid...it takes days for him to get back to normal. All of a sudden he's super serious, easily irritable and stressed out. Acting out.😔 I'm trying to encourage him to enjoy his youth. Yes I want him to take his education and his life choices seriously but at the same time he's 11😶 he has a hard time just relaxing sometimes. Like it takes max effort to chill. Idk guys. I wish his dad was the kind of guy I could lean on for the dad things. Send him off for the weekend or maybe a week at dads house every once in a while. But I don't want my son acting like him. He's got a lot of great things to impart. I used to think even if he wasn't a great husband to me at least he was a good dad to them. But then I started hearing about how different he was behind closed doors. How he'd drill them about things and made them feel like they weren't following God correctly. Or like I was going to lead them all to danger because I didn't care or love them. It's just hard to parent when kids are drenched in fear and insecurity. Smh. He may not have said nothing crazy yet but I worry about how he manipulates their minds sometimes. I don't know what to do.
I know we are going through hard times and I just want to make it better. I wish my hugs could fix it some how
