Men, did you feel helpless when you had your baby?

Not really. I did not have much to do in the "having my baby" thing. Mostly watched it. Sure, I was supportive, gave leg and back massages, etc. But let's face it, women do all the work.

Post birth though, I was a fucking royal nervous wreck. Why isn't he making any noises (I came to regret asking about 10 hours later). I was freaking out over whether my hands might slip, when I pick him up, I cold not take my eye off his mom as she was getting in and out of his baby seat, as she was walking holding around the house, over me giving him his bath, every step I took. Waking up every 3 seconds to check if he got struck by SIDS, and then listening in to make sure he's breathing. Not kidding about the 3 seconds.

I was like Stephen King, at work on a new novel, including every possible bad scenario, and then replaying it, over and over...

I knew I didn't have he instinct to sooth or comfort.
That amazing motherly instinct just isn't in me.

I was there to support. And be a dad. The other half of raising a young person.

Examples of other fatherly traits is gave. And still do.

Protector
Emotional anchor
Provider
Mentor
Celebrator

I do my very best to make sure my wife and children are on the best road possible in life by doing what it takes to give them the emotional security and comfort they need to move forwards successfully.

I don't remember feeling helpless, I just did what felt right and it seemed to work. I learned a lot and I remember my first lesson. Our first was a boy and we had problems getting him to sleep, so I'd put him in the car seat and go for a ride until he fell asleep. I think it was the third or maybe first time I did it solo, I began to smell something as we rode along, and knowing that meant he needed to be changed, I pulled over, took him out of his car seat, put him on his back and started the process. It was night so even with the overhead light on I couldn't be sure I'd got him cleaned, so I leaned down to see better. Yeah, a golden shower ensued. Lesson learned.

Didn't feel helpless. I felt ready and was there as much at night to change and walk him. We had a lot of practice as he had ear infections and asthma and was up a lot in the first 2 years.

nope i felt utterly useless. I honestly had no clue what i was doing at first. For what should have been one of the happiest times, turned into one of the most stressful but eventually you get your head around it all and it gets easier and easier

No i felt i did not have natural instincts on how to comfort and care for my first baby i have two grown up now well one is just turned 16 and she is me top to bottom personality wise scary but no i didnt feel it came naturally although one that did was i was the only one that could get her to sleep most nights for quite a while, what instinct that did come naturally to me was the strong feeling that i had to protect her from whatever in my life time tried to harm or hurt her in any form and that feeling still sits with me today but yes overall I did kinda feel helpless.

At first it was overwhelming. But I feel like I adapted quickly. Definitely helps with a good partner. And advice with family. But it’s hard to prepare

I had some experience with babies before I had my own so I was comfortable, but still learned a lot.

I never liked my inlaws until I learned how smart they were

I don't need a baby to feel helpless

I don't think I'd know what to do with a kid under 2

No i did not, not on the first one. I was lost and was reading books every second i could

We adopted and I was a stay-at-home father from the time the kid was 2 months old.

No. Lynn didn't nurse our first child, so midnight feedings were my job. I learned fast.

No, it seemed so natural to take care of them and nurture them.

Men can't give birth. Trick question.

Or can they?

Yes, took a few days to get back on my feet.

Goodness to go back then

what? I can't even get pregnant!

Yes and no. It's a learning process.