I Love My Children
My husband and I are already discussing with our boys if they want to go to college in a couple of years. Where did the days go? 馃槅
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rckt148 路 61-69, M
I am trying to get 2 of my granddaughters back into college
One threw away a 6 yr full ride scholarship so her man could pursue his dream
Now he drives a beer truck for a local brewery
The other one ,her man won't work at all
He wants her to support him ,any work he does is his "Spending money "
and he is living off of my Granddaughter and his elderly Grandma
She is almost ready to come home
If I can get the rest of the family to stop downing him to her
The more bad things people say about him the more she protects him
My daughters should know ,,that is exactly what I went through with them
but they did finally go back to college
My youngest Daughter while she was pregnant
It made me mad my oldest granddaughter deprived someone else of that scholarship for her to throw it away ,
But she can still go back ,she has 2 yrs under her belt already she completed while she was still in high school ,
I never had the opportunity theses kids have had
I push educations ,
My girls are all doing well for themselves ,once they decided to listen
my Grand son is too ,,he has an awesome career now
but he also had a lot of breaks ,but he is a hard worker and because of it
people seen to it he was in the right places he needed to be .
One threw away a 6 yr full ride scholarship so her man could pursue his dream
Now he drives a beer truck for a local brewery
The other one ,her man won't work at all
He wants her to support him ,any work he does is his "Spending money "
and he is living off of my Granddaughter and his elderly Grandma
She is almost ready to come home
If I can get the rest of the family to stop downing him to her
The more bad things people say about him the more she protects him
My daughters should know ,,that is exactly what I went through with them
but they did finally go back to college
My youngest Daughter while she was pregnant
It made me mad my oldest granddaughter deprived someone else of that scholarship for her to throw it away ,
But she can still go back ,she has 2 yrs under her belt already she completed while she was still in high school ,
I never had the opportunity theses kids have had
I push educations ,
My girls are all doing well for themselves ,once they decided to listen
my Grand son is too ,,he has an awesome career now
but he also had a lot of breaks ,but he is a hard worker and because of it
people seen to it he was in the right places he needed to be .
rckt148 路 61-69, M
@ClanNaFiacaillApWythe No they are not "martyring themselves"
My oldest granddaughter is super smart ,and she wears the pants in her marriage ,but she weighed the benefit of letting him complete his college first ,and though she threw away her scholarship
The profession he has picked does pay a lot of money ,BUT ,there are also a billion ex stars in the field wanting that job too ,He didn't want to hear that ,now he has no choice ,but he is working his butt off I give him that ,
His collage against men who are well known ,he is not ,,so he was a little arrogant and cocky ,,ex army know it all
But now just a little more humble ,,but my granddaughter did throw away a golden chance for him ,,so now he is working his tail off and she is getting ready to go back to school and as promised ,,he is going to pay for it
But both are under 25 and buying a house and they outright own 2 very nice cars ,they both work hard I am proud of them .
The younger one fell for a bad boy ,lots of promises until she moved in with him ,,once she got to working ,and he seen his meal ticket
She makes good money and tips because she is so sweet and pretty
and he lays on his dead ass letting her support him
But she is tiring of it (already asked us to come get her ,but he cried and promised to do better ,,she is not going to buy that crap long)
She is tired and needs to rest and he has a non stop party ,and she is paying for it that is why I call them "Bad Boys " they are sorry excuses for men
but you can't tell you're kids anything ,they have to learn their way .
No she is not a martyr and I would say in the very near future
He is going to get his arse kicked ,,BAD ,,
many in the family want to do it (You don't mess with my family )
everyone is already betting if its her that hurts him or my grandson ,,LOL
We are just waiting for HER to say she is tired of it
Then we will support her while she goes back to school
and he recovers from the beat down he has coming ,,he was warned
She has a very close family ,,you better keep you're word ,be a man
He didn't listen ,,,he is a bad boy ,,but she had to learn
she won't be so gullible next time
We believe in letting our kids learn from their own mistakes
Then when they ask for help ,then we help
Like their Mom (both of them are my oldest daughters kids )
She had to show how stubborn she was ,learn her lesson
They are doing the same ,,now Momma is seeing what she put me through
But now she is doing very well ,,once she came home and went back to college ,with 2 kids to raise and no Dad ..he was a bad boy too
She asked for Dads advice after that ,but sometimes still ignores it
Now she has another husband she tolerates ,but she made her bed
she is sleeping in it ,,but she does real well for HERSELF
none of my girls need a man ,,they are all very self reliant
Like their Dad ,they had to learn the hard way ,for some of us ,its the only way ,but we get there eventually
My oldest granddaughter is super smart ,and she wears the pants in her marriage ,but she weighed the benefit of letting him complete his college first ,and though she threw away her scholarship
The profession he has picked does pay a lot of money ,BUT ,there are also a billion ex stars in the field wanting that job too ,He didn't want to hear that ,now he has no choice ,but he is working his butt off I give him that ,
His collage against men who are well known ,he is not ,,so he was a little arrogant and cocky ,,ex army know it all
But now just a little more humble ,,but my granddaughter did throw away a golden chance for him ,,so now he is working his tail off and she is getting ready to go back to school and as promised ,,he is going to pay for it
But both are under 25 and buying a house and they outright own 2 very nice cars ,they both work hard I am proud of them .
The younger one fell for a bad boy ,lots of promises until she moved in with him ,,once she got to working ,and he seen his meal ticket
She makes good money and tips because she is so sweet and pretty
and he lays on his dead ass letting her support him
But she is tiring of it (already asked us to come get her ,but he cried and promised to do better ,,she is not going to buy that crap long)
She is tired and needs to rest and he has a non stop party ,and she is paying for it that is why I call them "Bad Boys " they are sorry excuses for men
but you can't tell you're kids anything ,they have to learn their way .
No she is not a martyr and I would say in the very near future
He is going to get his arse kicked ,,BAD ,,
many in the family want to do it (You don't mess with my family )
everyone is already betting if its her that hurts him or my grandson ,,LOL
We are just waiting for HER to say she is tired of it
Then we will support her while she goes back to school
and he recovers from the beat down he has coming ,,he was warned
She has a very close family ,,you better keep you're word ,be a man
He didn't listen ,,,he is a bad boy ,,but she had to learn
she won't be so gullible next time
We believe in letting our kids learn from their own mistakes
Then when they ask for help ,then we help
Like their Mom (both of them are my oldest daughters kids )
She had to show how stubborn she was ,learn her lesson
They are doing the same ,,now Momma is seeing what she put me through
But now she is doing very well ,,once she came home and went back to college ,with 2 kids to raise and no Dad ..he was a bad boy too
She asked for Dads advice after that ,but sometimes still ignores it
Now she has another husband she tolerates ,but she made her bed
she is sleeping in it ,,but she does real well for HERSELF
none of my girls need a man ,,they are all very self reliant
Like their Dad ,they had to learn the hard way ,for some of us ,its the only way ,but we get there eventually
rckt148 路 61-69, M
@ClanNaFiacaillApWythe Ya think ?
But when all of them own homes and the oldest is only 41
I think educations and a guide with lots of experience helped
None of my kids have went through major struggles and 2 of them have lost mates to death ,they are self reliant ,they bounce back quick
They had kids to raise ,and a good support system ,,Family
But I feel letting them learn early from their own mistakes helped a lot too
But when all of them own homes and the oldest is only 41
I think educations and a guide with lots of experience helped
None of my kids have went through major struggles and 2 of them have lost mates to death ,they are self reliant ,they bounce back quick
They had kids to raise ,and a good support system ,,Family
But I feel letting them learn early from their own mistakes helped a lot too
ClanNaFiacaillApWythe 路 51-55, M
@rckt148 Yeah, it isn't right to try to live another person's life for them. One sees many over-protective mothers and possessive mates attempting to do that. Yes. Resilience is important. I am more middle class but see resilience as being more important than self esteem. Justified confidence comes from competence. Competence can only be gained by doing. Have heard it takes at least 10,000 hours of practice to get good in anything. (I would say it takes more than that to gain real expertise.) Happiness is earned. Can share that last with your daughters. Think it was the tag-line introductory moral to Sinbad:Prince of Thieves or Thief of Baghdad interestingly enough.
rckt148 路 61-69, M
@ClanNaFiacaillApWythe did you just insinuate I run my kids and grandkids lives ?
Did you miss they are allowed to make their own mistakes ,then when they ask for help they have it ,and then and only then do I help support them or anything else they need to succeed ,,and yea ,we are also middle class
You can say I surpassed that several times ,lost it all ,worked my way back and health took took it all again ,and a divorce took the rest ,,but I always bounce back
My kids took their ques from me because they asked ,,
Now all of them are doing very well for themselves
The grand kids will surpass us all ,2 of them are already middle class and they are only 23 and 19 and rising fast in their fields
The one that threw away her scholarships is doing fine without them
She manages a company ,buying her own home and her cars are paid for already
Like me ,they got an early jump .only they went to college while still in high school ,I am a drop out that had to work a lot harder to make mine
But considering I have a disease eating my spine ,and I had no one help me because until about 5 yrs ago no one believed me
Its really not easy rising in any field in pain ,,you could say I have mastered 3 and I have been very successful in all of them
SO that is why they ask advice from me ..In spite of all my set backs
I still set the right examples ,gave good advice
I hope the 2 that have dropped out of college return
But I am not trying to run their lives ,,I just give sound advice when its asked for ,,my kids and grandkids have always been allowed to live their own lives ,make their own mistakes
But we are an extremely close family ,some have said rare ,,to see 10 people so close and all on the same page
I help when asked ,I will support them if they are in school ,even give them cars ,but I don't run any of their lives
I teach them to be self reliant ,and let them run their own
They chose to include me in it and call me the head of our family
a position given to me out of respect ,not control
All but one of them is grown ,come December the youngest ,,except my son who is 11 will be 18
You can't control grown ups ,,they want to be around you and ask you're advice and opinions or they don't
I am just blessed ,,my family values mine
maybe because they can see ,noting keeps me down ,I always bounce back
[quote]Yeah, it isn't right to try to live another person's life for them.[/quote]
thats funny
Did you miss they are allowed to make their own mistakes ,then when they ask for help they have it ,and then and only then do I help support them or anything else they need to succeed ,,and yea ,we are also middle class
You can say I surpassed that several times ,lost it all ,worked my way back and health took took it all again ,and a divorce took the rest ,,but I always bounce back
My kids took their ques from me because they asked ,,
Now all of them are doing very well for themselves
The grand kids will surpass us all ,2 of them are already middle class and they are only 23 and 19 and rising fast in their fields
The one that threw away her scholarships is doing fine without them
She manages a company ,buying her own home and her cars are paid for already
Like me ,they got an early jump .only they went to college while still in high school ,I am a drop out that had to work a lot harder to make mine
But considering I have a disease eating my spine ,and I had no one help me because until about 5 yrs ago no one believed me
Its really not easy rising in any field in pain ,,you could say I have mastered 3 and I have been very successful in all of them
SO that is why they ask advice from me ..In spite of all my set backs
I still set the right examples ,gave good advice
I hope the 2 that have dropped out of college return
But I am not trying to run their lives ,,I just give sound advice when its asked for ,,my kids and grandkids have always been allowed to live their own lives ,make their own mistakes
But we are an extremely close family ,some have said rare ,,to see 10 people so close and all on the same page
I help when asked ,I will support them if they are in school ,even give them cars ,but I don't run any of their lives
I teach them to be self reliant ,and let them run their own
They chose to include me in it and call me the head of our family
a position given to me out of respect ,not control
All but one of them is grown ,come December the youngest ,,except my son who is 11 will be 18
You can't control grown ups ,,they want to be around you and ask you're advice and opinions or they don't
I am just blessed ,,my family values mine
maybe because they can see ,noting keeps me down ,I always bounce back
[quote]Yeah, it isn't right to try to live another person's life for them.[/quote]
thats funny
rckt148 路 61-69, M
@ClanNaFiacaillApWythe Sorry if I misunderstood ,,I guide ,I teach ,I buy tool and pay for educations ,buy them cars so they can get to school and hold a job if they want ,,but I don't try to control any of them
I am the one that never says "I told you so " but I am the one that says
You know what the rules are here ,this is temporary ,welcome home
And I want them back in their own place as soon as possible
Or else I will get used to them being home ,and not want them to leave
Love must be tough ,and usually its the toughest on me
I love to see them happy and doing good on their own ,,but I hate to see them leave ,,but I made mine ,,when I am gone ,I want to know I did my best
they will be fine ..
everything I do for others ,I take from me
My spine is getting worse ,,soon I won't be able to do for myself
How much of a burden I am on them will determine if I stay in my new home
or let them have it and go to a VA facility ,and let them visit
I never want to control or be a burden ,,I am super man
I won't make them think any less of me ,,thanks for indulging me ,I know I can go on ,,and you're kindness
and yes ,I hate parents that won't let their kids grow up
thats whats wrong with out country ,,kids never grow up
Mine are leaders ,they are not in that number
I made sure they had the tools ,no one ever gave me
I was a star ,,God gave my talents to me ,my abilities to win were already in me
I am the one that never says "I told you so " but I am the one that says
You know what the rules are here ,this is temporary ,welcome home
And I want them back in their own place as soon as possible
Or else I will get used to them being home ,and not want them to leave
Love must be tough ,and usually its the toughest on me
I love to see them happy and doing good on their own ,,but I hate to see them leave ,,but I made mine ,,when I am gone ,I want to know I did my best
they will be fine ..
everything I do for others ,I take from me
My spine is getting worse ,,soon I won't be able to do for myself
How much of a burden I am on them will determine if I stay in my new home
or let them have it and go to a VA facility ,and let them visit
I never want to control or be a burden ,,I am super man
I won't make them think any less of me ,,thanks for indulging me ,I know I can go on ,,and you're kindness
and yes ,I hate parents that won't let their kids grow up
thats whats wrong with out country ,,kids never grow up
Mine are leaders ,they are not in that number
I made sure they had the tools ,no one ever gave me
I was a star ,,God gave my talents to me ,my abilities to win were already in me