I Admire My Mother
My relationship with my mother was... complicated to say the least.
The thing is, my mother had Paranoid Schizophrenia. It took a toll on every aspect in her life. Young me used to hate her for it. I used to tell myself,write in my diary, [i]why is my mom this way?[/i]
I looked at my other friends' mothers and wished she was like them. I used to envy every one of them.
But I was too stupid to realise how much she truly loved me. I only realised it after she passed away.
I realised that she was the only one who supported me in my decisions. She was the only shoulder I looked to cry one when I was upset. She was the only one who encouraged me and motivated me. Despite all the fights we got in, every time I didn't understand her, every time her Schizophrenia acted up, she loved me like hell.
I love you, mom. Please forgive me for all the hard times I gave you as a child 💙
The thing is, my mother had Paranoid Schizophrenia. It took a toll on every aspect in her life. Young me used to hate her for it. I used to tell myself,write in my diary, [i]why is my mom this way?[/i]
I looked at my other friends' mothers and wished she was like them. I used to envy every one of them.
But I was too stupid to realise how much she truly loved me. I only realised it after she passed away.
I realised that she was the only one who supported me in my decisions. She was the only shoulder I looked to cry one when I was upset. She was the only one who encouraged me and motivated me. Despite all the fights we got in, every time I didn't understand her, every time her Schizophrenia acted up, she loved me like hell.
I love you, mom. Please forgive me for all the hard times I gave you as a child 💙
