Hate being here

I realize just how I guess fearful of my mother I am. Like I said, I moved in with her whilst my struggle with alcoholism led me to either go into crippling debt for rehab or essentially become a prisoner in her home. I’m sober and I’m hoping to be gone soon but I’ve been thinking. I can’t lock my door unless she’s asleep. She barges in and will be angry if I lock it. I ask for permission to use the restroom or shower. I avoid the hall and kitchen if she is in them to avoid getting in her way. Essentially I’m constantly walking on eggshells. I hate it. I did try to choose rehab but my caseworker couldn’t find one with a bed available. So I said can I sleep on the floor 🤡