My son thinks I don't love him. It brings on the self harm feelings very strongly.

I worked so hard to even get pregnant, I had fertility issues. And the moment they laid him on me he's all I ever wanted. It's been rough at times because I was alone and grieving, I know I have had my faults, but I've done everything for him and with him. Every step, I've been there. But I'm not a good mom. I'm tired. I'm alone. I failed him. I don't want encouragement. I don't need to hear that I am a good mom. I feel like complete crap.