Be gentle with yourself as you process your grief. It's going to be a turbulent road for you emotionally.
Don't act further on how you feel right now, you've already dealt with the things that you needed to do immediately, so give yourself time to settle down and process your feelings before you worry about his possessions and photos... you might feel differently in the future.
@StarsMISaligned It took me years to find the way to explain how I felt in those initial years after I cut him out of my life and it was only when I realised that I don't even know what a dad does for his children that I realised that I was grieving for the dad that I didn't have rather than the monster that I was given.
I'll probably always be dealing with the trauma in one way or another by now. I'm not really that interested in getting a formal diagnosis for my DID, knowing that they will likely want me to be integrated... I've been dissociating from the age of five I'm quite comfortable with my three known identities, you know??? I think that I'd rather stay as I am than find more than I know I have (and there's a chance that there are more).
Been there. So I can honestly say I know exactly how you feel. I was to the point that every time the phone rang, I just knew it was someone to tell me my son was dead. All you can do is give it to God. You do whatever you have to do for your and your husband's peace of mind. Let go and give it to God. That's exactly what I did.
Its sad to see anyone go thru what your familys going thru.I understand wanting your son out of your life,i just hope your last feeling of anger isnt forever.I hope you find peace in your heart soon.
I am so sorry for every tragic heartbreak your family has gone through. As a mother i couldn't imagine what you're going through as a daughter who has made a lot of the sams bad choices as your son I'm forever disgusted with what i put my parents and family through
It has to be the most difficult thing a parent can do, cut off a child. I wish you luck and I truly hope he will turn himself in, pay his dues and turn his life around. Not only for him, but for you and your family as well.
You are right in cutting ties with him He is, unfortunately only trouble Don’t feel guilty He has done more harm than good Live your life without him Take care
If he started at 15 and is now 36 and STILL a criminal, there probably isn't much hope.
Some people are career criminals.
There are "normally good" people who break the law, then there are true "bad guys". This kind of life is all he really knows or understands. Unfortunately, you have no choice but to get him out of your life.
@HoeBag unfortunately you are correct. We didn't raise him to be like this. That's not how our family operates. Noone in our family is like this. He chooses to live like this and we can no longer be exposed and hurt and humiliated by it. Thank you so much for your input!
@StarsMISaligned You're welcome. Unfortunately, I think most families have at least one member who is like that. As parents, we raise our kids best we can but eventually they have to make their own choices.
