I'm having a very serious problem in my life and I need to let it out and talk about it.

I have made the difficult decision to completely cut out my adult son from my life for good. The level of manipulation, lying, betrayal and abuse he has given to me and my husband and mother is too much to overcome. I have guilt and pain and hearbreak but its necessary for our peace. I've actually tried to do this a few times in the past but then allowed communication again. I guess you have to go through several gut punches until you're finally DONE.
We've recently hired a fugitive recovery agent to try and locate him to get him arrested. He's hiding out and who knows when he'll be found....I just want him apprehended to face the consequences of his behavior. And I face losing $1700.00 in bonds that I STUPIDLY posted for him. I know, I know, why did I do such a thing?! Several reasons that no longer matter. Lesson learned. I just can't believe he's hiding from the 4 arrest warrants out on him. He's always gone to court to handle his legal affairs. There's been A LOT. He's never missed or avoided court. Til now. Its made me physically ill - I can't sleep. I want to burn his belongings and pictures. I want to rip his arms off and beat him with them. I'm scared of my own anger. He's our only son. But has found violence, alcohol, and trouble since 15yo. He's gone through periods of time where he's productive, helpful, positive, sober, but then falls off again. Full of excuses and its always someone else's fault....
I'm done with living like this. He's 36yo. I need to permanently get off the crazy train.
Pray for me and my husband's peace. And pray he gets apprehended soon!
Thank you for reading about my story.

*update 9/20/25* He was apprehended and is in jail now. He has not attempted to contact us so I'm sure he got the memo we're done with him.

Domking · 61-69, M

Must be very stressful, painful for you and your family.( I have been through such situations, and known about this stage.)
However, if you persist it will drain you emotionally, health-wise and financially as well. Moreover, that may not bring peace, either.
So, you had to do what had to be done.
Stay strong and look after yourselves.
My empthay for you.

StarsMISaligned · 51-55, F

@Domking I appreciate your compassion and comment. It definitely has taken a toll in all those areas. I will gain more resolve and strength daily.
Thank you!

Tumbleweed · F

Been there. So I can honestly say I know exactly how you feel. I was to the point that every time the phone rang, I just knew it was someone to tell me my son was dead. All you can do is give it to God. You do whatever you have to do for your and your husband's peace of mind. Let go and give it to God. That's exactly what I did.