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I told my mom my dad was cheating on her

They’ve been married for 35 or something years. I am so disappointed because I was suspecting my dad was doing something behind our backs back in December. A few days ago, I went through his deleted messages and found messages to a woman who isnt my mom. He says they’re just messages but according to the messages (which he’d delete every few days entirely), he would fill up her car with gas and pick up her daughter from school.

I confronted him about this that night and threatened to never speak to him again. I warned him that if he ever spoke to her again even if that lady or her daughter were at risk of some preventable death, I’d tell my mother.

Today I found messages to a mechanic where it mentioned that he was fixing a ford focus. In the messages to the woman, he was so concerned about the safety of her car and he was babying her with kind words that you would a girlfriend.

Anyway,

I was able to see that he has been in contact with this woman by looking at his TMobile call and text log which go back almost two years. I don’t know what to do but I am starting to regret telling my mom about this because she is such a hardworking and loving wife and mother. She can be very tough and critical of my dad who doesn’t clean up after herself, but she really didn’t deserve this.

I’ve told my siblings and we’ve taken my dad’s cards and phone away. We told him to leave and be with his lover since he chose her over his wife.

I regret telling my mom because she is in so much pain and our family has fallen apart. I really don’t believe my mom will forgive him and we all thought he was such a great dad but this is an unbelievable betrayal.
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dale74 · M
Well I don't condone the cheating but you shattered your mother's world. What's your dad is done is totally wrong but you're hurting your mother more than him. Most psychiatrist and marriage counselors say that the cheating should be something that the cheater has to live with by telling the one who's cheated on you have shattered their world the cheater already knew he was cheating or she in other cases. You don't know what led to this you don't know for a fact that your mother has never cheated.