I've tried for years to understand

Why my dad pushed me away. I could never understand. He passed away two years ago. I've barely felt his absence. Maybe it was a good thing to be spared such deep grief

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RedBaron · M

You never will.

The only healthy way to move forward is to acknowledge and feel the pain (perhaps with therapy) and to forgive him for hurting you and forgive yourself for being angry at him for it.

All that isn’t as easy as it sounds.