Did I cry today? Yes.
Motherhood is overwhelming sometimes…
Oldest Teens going through a rebellion stage but seeming to come out of it and is making better choices.
Second teen is in the pushing my buttons stage and this one is the reason I cried today. I’m kinda sensitive right now and he was mad I didn’t bring him any takeout. But I called him to see if he wanted anything and I couldn’t hear him so I asked are you sleeping and he yelled “yeah” so I hung up and brought him nothing
When we finished eating he came upstairs to see what leftovers there was for dinner , I didn’t cook so it was just takeout and there was nothing left
He got upset, and I told him I was sorry but that’s why I called. He stormed out of the kitchen and I said “do you want me to make you a sandwich” and I didn’t hear his reply because he slammed the baby gate and the stairwell door. So I went to take the toddler and baby to sleep
He came back up 20min later and said “sorry mom, did you make me my sandwich?” I said “no because you never replied” he said “I said yeah” and I had to remind him that I’m losing my hearing in my right ear and him speaking while slamming doors isn’t going to make me hear him any better.
He said “I’m sorry mom and left a upset again”
And I couldn’t help but bawl my eyes out
I feel unappreciated, like a nuisance and a bother to everyone. There’s no room for any mistakes on my end or I feel like the shittiest mom.
But as soon as anyone needs anything I’m there, always trying to help and make everyone happy.
I wish someone tried to make me this happy. No one ever seems to consider me my husband does, I guess, sometimes but it’s never without a second purpose.
Oh my toddler was just diagnosed on the autism spectrum… dealing with his recent meltdowns have been difficult, I feel inadequate and ill equipped for everything right now.
Sorry for this big rant.
Oldest Teens going through a rebellion stage but seeming to come out of it and is making better choices.
Second teen is in the pushing my buttons stage and this one is the reason I cried today. I’m kinda sensitive right now and he was mad I didn’t bring him any takeout. But I called him to see if he wanted anything and I couldn’t hear him so I asked are you sleeping and he yelled “yeah” so I hung up and brought him nothing
When we finished eating he came upstairs to see what leftovers there was for dinner , I didn’t cook so it was just takeout and there was nothing left
He got upset, and I told him I was sorry but that’s why I called. He stormed out of the kitchen and I said “do you want me to make you a sandwich” and I didn’t hear his reply because he slammed the baby gate and the stairwell door. So I went to take the toddler and baby to sleep
He came back up 20min later and said “sorry mom, did you make me my sandwich?” I said “no because you never replied” he said “I said yeah” and I had to remind him that I’m losing my hearing in my right ear and him speaking while slamming doors isn’t going to make me hear him any better.
He said “I’m sorry mom and left a upset again”
And I couldn’t help but bawl my eyes out
I feel unappreciated, like a nuisance and a bother to everyone. There’s no room for any mistakes on my end or I feel like the shittiest mom.
But as soon as anyone needs anything I’m there, always trying to help and make everyone happy.
I wish someone tried to make me this happy. No one ever seems to consider me my husband does, I guess, sometimes but it’s never without a second purpose.
Oh my toddler was just diagnosed on the autism spectrum… dealing with his recent meltdowns have been difficult, I feel inadequate and ill equipped for everything right now.
Sorry for this big rant.
36-40, F
