Sometimes it’s best to do your own thing 🖤

My family and so called friends have always made it clear to me that I am not special. But I don’t care, I know I’m not. I don’t want to be. I’ve never fit in anywhere. I enjoy what I enjoy, when I want to. I don’t hurt anyone or anything and when people act busted up about me needing space, I know they don’t have the patience for me. I know it’s never going to be a mutually beneficial connection because I’ll need to spend so much energy wading through their ego, we’ll never reach the depths of each other.

But my paint and brushes never beg of me. My pen and journal are always open. When I sing, I can harmonize with the frequency of my soul. No one ever sees this side of me. Because it’s special to me and I won’t have anyone coming in and wrecking my internal peace.

JustNik · 51-55, F

Of course you’re special. Anyone with the courage to be their authentic self is special, and I bet a good many have been told they’re not. Isn’t that how it usually goes? They either tell you with love that you are or tell you with malice that you’re not. The former is nice, the latter is just sad. I didn’t like to see you agreeing with something that didn’t come from a good place (not that what I like matters, but this is the 2-cents club here 🤭), but I am so so happy at how firmly rooted you are in your truth. I’m happy FOR you. It can be hard and lonely, but at least it’s always real. It’s a small and ugly mind who has to try to squash that. 🤗🤗🤗😄👍

RebelFox · 36-40, F

@JustNik I don’t want say that peoples perceptions matter, but on the whole, it does determine the level of loneliness I experience. When people find you strange, they keep you at a safe distance, they keep it casual. That’s not enough for me. The ache of not settling for less is a constant reminder that I am not acceptable in social settings. And I love people so much 😂 It’s a bummer. My friends on SW are the only ones who see me. Any and all support and love I get is from you guys and that means a lot 🖤 Thank you for seeing me🖤🖤🖤

RebelFox · 36-40, F

@SW-User I will. I wish I were not where I am geographically, but I trust the process and make the best. I wish I could make people love me 🖤