Do you have narcissistic family members?

It's been 12 years since I moved out of that toxic environment, I remember her saying. Oh you will be back begging because you will never manage a life on your own.
12 years and counting! Let her control my other siblings and live through them.
I always find ways to respect her but also stay the hell far away as possible.

I've decided long ago, there is something wrong with her.... when she started competing with me. That's disgusting no mother should compete with her own daughter.

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SW-User

I'm glad you found your way out and never looked back.

Why would you think she deserves respect? Simply because she gave birth to you doesn't automatically entitle her to respect if she's been a toxic mother.

And yes, I have narcissistic and toxic family members. I've cut them out of my life.

RadiantRuby

@SW-User She always guilt trips me , but it's the way I've been brought up. My father and his mother raised me , I think that's the only way I turned out decent. But after my father passed away I was 17 , so I went to live with her. My father really loved, Can you believe this women said the only reason my father loved me is because he was obsessed with her and couldn't have her. Thus he showed his love for her through me.
That makes me laugh, my father hardly ever mentioned her and he remarried happily.

cherokeepatti · 61-69, F

@RadiantRuby she apparently was jealous of your relationship with your father, wasn’t she?

RadiantRuby

@cherokeepatti Oh yeah may he RIP
He was a very loving kind father.
Family members and friends always tell her that my father loved me and she was very jealous. She also made sure to speak ill of him when it suits her.

SW-User

@RadiantRuby I'm glad you see that Patti's right.

Your mother created an entire scenario in her head because she couldn't accept the reality of the situation. Her jealousy over your relationship with your father made/makes her lash out at you and try to hurt you. She's attempting to make you pay for the fact that he moved on from her. She might even see him when she sees you, reminding her of her failure, which she can't accept. Only she knows what's going on in that screwy head of hers. After so many years being divorced, it takes a very small, mean-spirited, and selfish person to continue to speak ill of the dead. Tells me she never got over and moved on from the divorce.

Honestly, that's a woman you should cut out of your life. If you can't because of your siblings, have as little contact as possible with her. She's never going to change and will always try to find ways to hurt you. She's stuck in a pattern of denial and refuses to take any accountability for it. Victim mentality.

RadiantRuby

@SW-User Thank you everything you said made perfect sense. I will be reading it again.
A very good way you put it