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Multiverse

So something weird happens to me every time I work late. While I’m trying to get my deadlines done my mind will slip into a mode where I can feel like I’m in my old bedroom when I lived with my parents or to my old office when I used to work in an office, specifically in my early twenties when I’d work overnight more often than not and feel like I was the last person awake in the city.

For a while I kicked around a geek idea of when my mind is so caught up in my work it was like my consciousness was weaving in and out of the various multiverse versions of myself. Then it made me wish it was possible to somehow stop in and live out parts of my life in those versions I felt were bad decisions on my part.

So somewhere out there there could be a version of me living it up rather than feeling like I will never know how to relax or when I can have a vacation. Go alternate version me! And for the love of god do not mess up with the blonde model! Big mistake!
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Luckylu · 61-69, F
If you went back and changed those things you would be changing who you are and you would no longer be the person you were when you went back and made the changes. Who would you be then?
PassingThrough · 41-45, M
@Luckylu I’d be a stranger to myself at this point. As someone who’s lived this long with the life I have I wouldn’t change it, warts and all. I do sometimes wish I got a sneak peek to see what else might have been though.
Luckylu · 61-69, F
@PassingThrough I sometimes recreate periods in my life in my head, thinking about how they could have been different, but in doing so, that would mean I wasn’t the person I was at that time. Looking at it now after the experiences I’ve had, changes the way I look at those things in my past.
PassingThrough · 41-45, M
@Luckylu I definitely understand that. What ifs can be fun to think of but if someone ever gave me that chance I don’t know if I could.
Luckylu · 61-69, F
@PassingThrough I wouldn’t. It would be tempting to do, but what I have learned has been important lessons. It is hard to look at and think I could change something, maybe end up in a really happy relationship that lasted most of my life. That would be tempting to change, but I wouldn’t be who I am now. And my writing I think would suffer because of not having those experiences.
PassingThrough · 41-45, M
@Luckylu I respect that