how to handle a situation where you meet someone

and you would like a connection with them and to be friends but that person has the attitude or approach they can take you or leave you, and don't appear to have the same desire for connection or friendship with you?

i've been in that situation quite a few times through life and it does hurt, but i felt powerless as i realized if that's the way someone feels about you, them there's little you can do.....i mean i have also been like that with others i met, had a disinterest in wanting to know them.......so i understand why someone would feel that way, because i've felt that way about certain people, didn't want to know them......but it still hurts when you're on the receiving end of that treatment.

i also think i feel the desire for connection more, because i had a difficult adult life for various reasons and never found the friendships or relationships i hoped for, i missed out, so it's a double body blow when someone i wanted friendship with never felt the same towards me.

did anyone else experience this, how did you handle it?

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FrozenWasteland · 61-69, M

I think most of us experience this. Someone's friendship is a gift, freely given. It's not something that's to be expected or even something deserved.

All i can do is to offer my gift to another, freely, without expectation, and trust their judgement as to what they do with it, whether that's opening and enjoying it, offering something in return, or simply returning it unopened.

None of those choices are good or bad and it doesn't reflect on the quality of the gift i give (or on the giver). It's just their choice.

So, to the best of my ability, i accept their decision with whatever grace i can muster, and continue on my path wherever it lasts.

MayorOfCrushtown · M

not everyone was meant to be friends. and thats okay. i know im not everyones cup of tea and that is also okay.

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