What do u do when u keep trying to help a friend but it seems everything u do or say the friend doesn’t realise it and is ungrateful

They may not be ready yet to hear what you're telling them. They may have to work through some stuff to get to the point where they are ready to realize it and accept it. All you can do, really, is give them the space they need to do what they need to do until they're ready, and just be there for them when they need to talk.