I had a great dream
I had a dream about that girl. The one that would leech on me for things like comfort, affection, sex, a gift 😂 and then go ghost once she got what she wanted. And when I'd ask her wtf this all even was, she'd be like "we're never gonna be together, it's just sex remember" and I'd be like "well I caught feelings so I want to cut this off now, do you want to be friends instead?" And she'd be like "No 🥺" and I'd think maybe she needed more "wooing" like as if, i Almost had her or some shit, I just needed to convince her I could be trusted. Like maybe she's never experienced this before, so I was patient and loving and I would be laughed at and called a simp for it 😂.
Sorry I needed to paint a picture. Also this emoji "🥺" is traumatizing now. It was used so much to reel me back in.
Anyway we were at a table, and she was being so nice and trying to get my attention but I was busy talking to friends and family, and drooling over the food at the picnic table. Like I saw some ribs 🤣😭. I was like "yum" while this bitch was desperately trying to get a word in, or at least a minute to talk to me. And I felt bad, and I kind of wanted to maybe separate us from the distractions. I've never seen her try for me before so that was weird. But everything she was in the inside during that time and period seemed to be showing on the outside. And I was thinking she's actually annoying and ugly 😂. Like any feelings I had left were just gone. Like she had finally come to her senses and actually wanted to talk. But I was so over it, and not even attracted to her anymore. And it was pure bliss. Now she was left begging for my attention. Now she was brushed off, now I was treating her as an option while my eyes wandered to all the other yummy things on the table. Now she felt hopeless and sad.
And no it's not that I was enjoying seeing her in pain. I'm not that kind of person, I actually felt bad. I was just in awe at how much I didn't even care. I almost felt nothing. I noticed the realization on her face. I got the feeling that she thought I'd always be there. Waiting. Like she thought she could come back and get me whenever she wanted and she was wrong.
The symbolism in the dream was 👌
I still care about them, but like from a distance like they don't need to be here, but I hope they grow up for their own good. Cause if not, they're gonna push away every good thing in their life. All they do is ruin ppl, and then quickly move on to the next thing to validate them and their feelings instead of going inward and trying to fix whatever they have going on inside. I saw that and tried to fix it, cause a bitch be thinking she's bob the builder, but I'm kind of into myself now since I noticed I was doing the same thing 😂. Needing people to convince me that I'm worthy and then them failing me every time and making me feel worse about myself.
I'm very much I want you, but don't need you energy now. I'll move on if I have to. Maybe try again in the next lifetime
Sorry I needed to paint a picture. Also this emoji "🥺" is traumatizing now. It was used so much to reel me back in.
Anyway we were at a table, and she was being so nice and trying to get my attention but I was busy talking to friends and family, and drooling over the food at the picnic table. Like I saw some ribs 🤣😭. I was like "yum" while this bitch was desperately trying to get a word in, or at least a minute to talk to me. And I felt bad, and I kind of wanted to maybe separate us from the distractions. I've never seen her try for me before so that was weird. But everything she was in the inside during that time and period seemed to be showing on the outside. And I was thinking she's actually annoying and ugly 😂. Like any feelings I had left were just gone. Like she had finally come to her senses and actually wanted to talk. But I was so over it, and not even attracted to her anymore. And it was pure bliss. Now she was left begging for my attention. Now she was brushed off, now I was treating her as an option while my eyes wandered to all the other yummy things on the table. Now she felt hopeless and sad.
And no it's not that I was enjoying seeing her in pain. I'm not that kind of person, I actually felt bad. I was just in awe at how much I didn't even care. I almost felt nothing. I noticed the realization on her face. I got the feeling that she thought I'd always be there. Waiting. Like she thought she could come back and get me whenever she wanted and she was wrong.
The symbolism in the dream was 👌
I still care about them, but like from a distance like they don't need to be here, but I hope they grow up for their own good. Cause if not, they're gonna push away every good thing in their life. All they do is ruin ppl, and then quickly move on to the next thing to validate them and their feelings instead of going inward and trying to fix whatever they have going on inside. I saw that and tried to fix it, cause a bitch be thinking she's bob the builder, but I'm kind of into myself now since I noticed I was doing the same thing 😂. Needing people to convince me that I'm worthy and then them failing me every time and making me feel worse about myself.
I'm very much I want you, but don't need you energy now. I'll move on if I have to. Maybe try again in the next lifetime
