The assumption they’re shallow (as opposed to simply having different priorities/values/reasons ) compared to you is a superiority belief, yes. Hard to say about the depressive or gossiping part though. They might be objectively gossipy, depressive person or it’s possible you might be one of those people who uses toxic positivity as a coping mechanism for your own emotional difficulties that gets agitated by people who do not use that strategy. (I’m not making an observation about you, just discussing what might be a play interactionally)
In my experience, people who have a creative, philosophical and/or intellectual have a hard time peopling. I think it’s fair to say that the world has more pragmatic people in it than artsy/brainy, which can feel lonely when you were trying to connect with people in a very particular way. after a while I think a lot of us develop a bit of a snobbery to cope and then sometimes we need another artsy/brainy person/group then everyone pat themselves on the back for being so much better than those non-artsy/brainy people. This comes up in dating too. It’s so tempting to put up with unhealthy bullshit longer than we really should have because it’s challenging to find another artsy/brainy lovers that you can connect to you in that particular way. This amplifies the lonely feeling.
I think.. artsy/brainy people often struggle with feelings of disconnectedness, but in reality they aren’t open to meeting people where those persons are at. They are disappointing other people do not meet them where they are at. I think.. in order to feel more connected to others we have to be willing to genuinely be receptive to who they are, not be pissy that they aren’t the way we want them to be, which is to say, more like us. The other thing is that artsy/brainy people tend to be more quick to discuss vulnerable topics whereas more pragmatic people tend to need more time getting to know someone to have those sprinkled conversations because they are not accustomed to it or sometimes they don’t feel safe to open up so readily. My point is, just because someone isn’t talking about their latest creative epiphany or philosophical inkling doesn’t mean they don’t have creative, contemplative, or introspective moments to who they are.
(Sorry for the long post. I’ve given a lot of thought to this topic over the years when contemplating my own loneliness)
