Upset
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Feeling lonely

My boyfriend moved out because his smoking was affecting my asthma. So now I live alone and I get lonely. I've only ever lived alone a couple of times for short periods because i've always been in a relationship. I have hobbies I can do so things to pass the time. But I haven't got any friends just him and family. It's the silence that drives me insane. I've got no-one to talk to. He is in sheltered accomodation and so has the other residents to talk to in the communal garden and sitting room. He has more of a life than I do. I feel annoyed because he chose smoking over me. He gets to have fun whilst I am just left here alone. It just doesn't seem fair because i've done so much for him. I looked after him whilst he was sick and everything. I just needed to come here and vent 😩
maybe the time you are spending alone will help you grow, I know its hard being a lone after a break up. But at the same time, a friend had said that if you were in love with the ex, after they leave, being alone too much is bad, and should be avoided. But hey, if you feel like the time you are spending a lone could be constructive in some way, why not try and get over the guy in a nice way? Sometimes they say the bravest people are also the loneliest.
@RubiesandButterflies okay, but maybe you should try and get used to it then? Or find a girl buddy, or get a cat
RubiesandButterflies · 51-55, F
@WhisperinAngelic101 yeah I know and I do have a cat.
@RubiesandButterflies cool, is the meow too low in volume
Fairydust · F
Does he not want to stop smoking for your sake?
So inconsiderate to you 😏 how long have you been together?

You should try and make friends, join some groups.
Fairydust · F
@RubiesandButterflies

I’m sorry, he sounds selfish.

Can’t he smoke outside at least?
RubiesandButterflies · 51-55, F
@Fairydust he moved out and yes I feel he was being selfish too. I'm having to redecorate which isn't easy when I've got pins and rods on my spine.
Fairydust · F
@RubiesandButterflies

I’m so sorry, sounds like you deserve better.
Maybe take this time to concentrate on yourself and get out and make friends.

There’s an app called [b]meet up[/b] lots of different local groups to join.
I’ve joined a few myself 😌 good way to meet people.
Neoerectus · M
Interesting he found it easier to give youjup rather than the cigs. Folks have no idea how the tobacco companies 'enhance' cigs to help increase the addiction...

Still, it can be done. My own mother stopped cold turkey after 20+ years. Cancer still killed her 25 years later.
Neoerectus · M
@RubiesandButterflies My oldest bro first lost both legs from ignored diabetes. He had all sorts of issues before dying at about 62.

It might be a blessing he left... My bro ended up in a care facility in last years.
RubiesandButterflies · 51-55, F
@Neoerectus im scared I have anxiety and he takes me to the places I'm too scared to go alone to like appointments that are on the other side of town.
Neoerectus · M
@RubiesandButterflies Our neighbor has suffered similarly after she escaped years of horrific abuse. We have helped AND she has been venturing forth more and more.
After reading through the comments makes no sense why he can’t just go outside at your house and smoke. Very selfish on his part.

He has not only hurt your health but his own and he won’t quit until it kills him.
@RubiesandButterflies hope things get better for you.
RubiesandButterflies · 51-55, F
@RubiesandButterflies you are so welcome
HappyCamper74 · 46-50, M
If I were you, I would choose someone else over him to spend my time with. You stood by his side while he was going through his sickness and ordeal. You have held up your end of the obligation to him. He has chose his path. I'll ne damned if I would allow him to chose my path too and be alone and lonely. Find yourself a new bf.
RubiesandButterflies · 51-55, F
@HappyCamper74 I don't want another bf I'm tired of being hurt.
Livingwell · 61-69, M
It's a big shock for sure. But now you have time to branch out and explore, find new friends, and become comfortable spending time alone. We are always here to offer kind words and encouragement.
RubiesandButterflies · 51-55, F
@Livingwell thanku
Handfull1 · 61-69, F
Sometimes we just love the wrong person. If he couldn’t quit smoking to save his own leg, how could he ever quit for someone else? Maybe someone else could help awhile while you find your own strength? God bless!
RubiesandButterflies · 51-55, F
@Handfull1 thanku
SW-User
i'm sorry you're feeling alone. change is hard 🤗

is he allowed to smoke inside his sheltered accommodation?
SW-User
@RubiesandButterflies can't he just smoke outside where you lived together? i'm just curious
RubiesandButterflies · 51-55, F
@SW-User yes but he chose to move out instead. Plus he keeps giving me a chest infection.
SW-User
@RubiesandButterflies well, i do hope something good is coming up for you. and no more chest troubles
Quimliqer · 70-79, M
If he couldn’t come up with a solution to his smoking and your asthma, you’re better off by yourself, as hard as it may be.

 
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