Just thinking

I hate that I have these moments. It sucks you can’t just shut off triggers from your childhood or outgrow them. I’m feeling angry when I think about it. Like I was a kid that really wasn’t loved or cared about. And it really doesn’t matter, it’s just the triggers that bother me so much. You know when your heart races and you can’t think? That feeling. Or how I struggle to trust people’s intentions. I’m being vague because idk maybe people can relate better that way. Because I’ve spent my life being “weird.” I’d like to talk to my therapist about this but it’s just not going to happen. Some things are better left unsaid.