@
MarkPaul i get that you were.
But we arent robots, we are complex emotional creatures.
Like you, i learnt the hard way.
Like you - i also analyse things and test things to see if there is a better way to do it.
BUT .....
I have learnt, (from many MANY executions of sharing my findings):
.......
DON'T DO IT !!!......(not unless its someone you are really close with and can trust and have a true friendship with)
AND you must say it as a question not a correction, [to leave space for them to keep their ideas ideal if they want to ]).
Plus, one must leave room for posaible error, (on ones own behalf), as not everyone's goals/expectations/nor manner or modes .....are the same as yours.
People like what they know.
They stick to habit and familiarity.
Example:
I know methylated spirits cleans of spirit marker really easily, cleanly and quickly.
im a professional cleaner)
My co- worker, (who was here before me and is 8 years older), uses another cleaner (which doesn't dissolve the marker), and a scourer.
Me: i hate that 😡
Its wrong! 😡
In my experience all that does is scratch the surface you're cleaning and make fine grooves for future dirt and bacteria to sit in.
- I told her about the metho and the science behind it.
- she was indignant and grumpy and told me, " well i find Dyno and a scourer work best" .
I was going to tell her the failings in her reasoning....but i also read her voice tone and body language, and realised id insulted her "professionalism" and way she does things.
Even though i KNOW what she does is completely wrong and actually does damage...(And it itches my damn brain its SO WRONG) - I say nothing.
I know im right - my brother taught me basic chemistry and i used it to find a solution that was easier and left a better result.
But ....
....peolle get offended if they are older than you, have more years at the job/activity,
Or....its something personal to them.
Sometimes, even if you know they are wrong ....you have to let them be wrong.
I have a motto...(One that i have to FORCE myself yo use) :
"
just because you think it - doesn't mean you have to say it"Sometimes my friend, its better for everyone if you just keep your mouth shut.
Its the way people are🤷♀
Plus.....sometimes, although you really truly
think you are right ....
You
might not be.
PLUS: (and this is REALLY important) -
DONT DO IT TO A BOSS !! .
i have 🙄
I told the boss, that i couldn't do what they asked due to what the "correct" protocols
actuallywere. And that wjat they were asking me to do was chemically toxic and dangerous.
- i
NEVER stopped paying for that one ! ....
FOR YEARS ! - she took it personally, and she made my working life hell until she retired.
To her, her ego was more important than than following department rules or safe chemical practice.
-- go figure--🤷♀
I know it may go against your train of logic and reason .....but its the way human are.
Its an unwritten rule.
You have to respect the person's feelings MORE than you respect the 'the truth as you see it'.
It's not easy to get used to doing.
But ....you WILL piss off less people 😅
...and us people are kinda glued together with sociabilty.... not facts or truths.
Sometimes ypu just have to listen, smile, express that you understand.... and THAT'S IT.
When people complain - its to be heard.
- They arent asking for advice,
- Or for you to fix it.
- They just want to vent.
((And yes....i see the irony of exactly what im doing to you right now🤦♀))
My intent is exaclty the same as yours - i just want to help.
It took me years, and quite a few friends telling me, exactly what im telling you now:
"- people dont always want help.
- people dont want someone to correct them
- people get offended when you do "
I know it makes no logical sense.
But it doesn't stop ot from being true in reality.
Keeping your truths to yourself will make things run smoother with people, and will stop others getting offened at you.
Think of it as "social lubrication":
Imagine "sociabilty" is a machine.
If a machine was perfect, itd run smooth, no gears would stick or grind....itd be fine.
But people arent perfect
Therefore our "machine" isnt perfect, and periodically needs grease.
Manners, and knowing when to shut the fuck up - is that grease.
Use your grease😅
I promise - it calms the savage moody beast within others, ...and just makes relationships with other people run smoother 🤷♀
