If you would find out that you are serious sick, would you want close people to stay close to you or you would want them to push away?

I had a tumour scare with my stomach ulcer which turned out all clear, but while I was going through that, along with a fucked up premonition I had about my fate last year which ended up wrong anyway, I kept myself distant and I was pushing my loved ones away, even friends. I even carried that behaviour here. I guess I did it one because I have a problem with showing my vulnerabilty, I hate asking for help, and I guess I didn't want anyone to be too upset if the inevitable did happen to me.