So the 22 or 23 or ..etc is allegedly my birthday. It is a long story. A bunch of friends insist to take me for a drink
It will be the very first time I actually do get drunk (or more). I had alcohol but didn't like it ,more than 13 years ago. It was vodka. And it was just a few sips.
My family organized a party for me tomorrow. I don't feel like doing that yet like always, I don't like policing other people's happiness.
I lost too many people this year. It doesn't feel celebratory. But hey, there will always be something to grieve. Whether it is related to me personally or not. I have to settle with the guilt and give others an opportunity to hope not everything is broken.
I often think of that last bit while teaching kids. Regardless of my beliefs, they are better off not being exposed to my disillusionment.
My family organized a party for me tomorrow. I don't feel like doing that yet like always, I don't like policing other people's happiness.
I lost too many people this year. It doesn't feel celebratory. But hey, there will always be something to grieve. Whether it is related to me personally or not. I have to settle with the guilt and give others an opportunity to hope not everything is broken.
I often think of that last bit while teaching kids. Regardless of my beliefs, they are better off not being exposed to my disillusionment.
