Part 2 of his birthday

I don't think we could of asked for a better evening.

After our zoo trip we all rested up and got ready for dinner. We made chicken tenders. I had the boys help me cook them. That was a very entertaining experience. But made some very nice tenders. I also made Mac and cheese but I chose to have Sissy help me with that. She is alot calmer than the boys. We had a picnic on the floor.

After that we had chocolate chip cake with chocolate chip icing. We sang happy birthday and he opened his gifts.

Our tiny tornado got spoiled. He got 3 new Lego sets, chiefs and royals shirts and jerseys. He has one happy kid.

Grandma left after the gifts

We all sat outside and watched the Royals win by the fire. The boys played on the swing set alot. I don't know how they had any energy left, us grownups were exhausted.

So we where putting them to bed and I asked him if he had a good birthday.

He said yes then got a sad look

What's wrong buddy.

Well I didn't get all my birthday wishes.

I was afraid to ask because I already knew what he was going to say

I know buddy and I am sorry.

I just hoped that mommy might remember it was my birthday and call me. But I guess she didn't.

I am broken right now. Joel is broken and neither of us know how to fix this. So we just did the best we could. We hugged him, kissed his forehead and I held him until he feel asleep.

His other birthday wish was to not have to sit in a buster seat in the car anymore. That I can't fix either.

This poor child of mine.

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OlderSometimesWiser · F

Sadly I don’t think there is any fixing it, not on your end. Best thing to do is just keep loving him through it. Fiercely, unconditionally and steadfastly as I know you will. 🫂

Cigarguy · M

@OlderSometimesWiser I just hate for him to be sad on his birthday. Sometimes I think it would be better if I told him she died. God I know that is horrible of me to say but at least he might get some closure and start to heal. I wouldn't do it but I've thought about it.

OlderSometimesWiser · F

@Cigarguy It is so incredibly sad. My heart breaks for you and your tiny tornado. 🫂

Not horrible of you to say, totally understandable. She’s put you in an excruciating situation. Thank God your children have you.

You don’t know her whereabouts, correct? Ugh, I just can’t fathom a mother doing this to her children.

Cigarguy · M

@OlderSometimesWiser last I heard she was in Florida but that was a year ago. I have no idea where she is now.

OlderSometimesWiser · F

@Cigarguy Just curious if you could find out, would you want to get in touch about the children or would it be better to leave it alone? And please, if this is me overstepping no worries, I’ll give you a hug and be on my way.

Cigarguy · M

@OlderSometimesWiser I really don't know. She's been gone for so long now I think it's best if she never comes back. I know she would only hurt them again if she did come back. She wouldn't stay or give them what they need. And I think it would be even harder for them to heal the second time around.

OlderSometimesWiser · F

@Cigarguy Makes sense and good that you have that clarity of mind about the situation- and about her. So while there’s always gonna be that sense of loss for the children, just continue providing them with a loving, supportive, secure, safe environment and in general being the great dad you are. You’ll get through this, together. 🙂

Cigarguy · M

@OlderSometimesWiser yeah I am always as honest as I can be with them. I also know this is more than I can handle, that is why they are both in counseling to help them cope with her leaving.