It's my birthday on Friday

I'll be 32 years old :3 To be honest, this is an age I never expected to get to. It's well past my wildest predictions in terms of how long I'd live - my plan was to die before turning 21. So I don't really know what I'm meant to do now - most people my age seem to have careers and families and I have none of that. I'm past the point of thinking the world would be better off without me, but so far it doesn't seem to be great with me in it either.